Kathy's Peace

Que Sera Sera

2012-01-14T21:18:00.000-05:00

We spent the day on Eastern Shore -- specifically at Kent Narrows for a pre-anniversary lunch. Tomorrow, January 15th, we will be married 40 years. Truthfully, I cannot believe this. We talked a lot about why our marriage is so successful. Initially, we couldn't come up with any reason but blind luck.

But then we started discussing how friends of ours hated and were so very disappointed in a trip we absolutely loved, and we came up with this: Some people have very unrealistic expectations about, well, EVERYTHING. Aside from our both agreeing on some rather important basics like fidelity and respect, neither of us had ANY expectations. If you had asked me 40 years ago if we would be married forever, I would have had no idea. We wanted to be together and whereas I realized I could very well live without him; I didn't want to. It hasn't all been roses; there's been quite a bit of fertilizer, but if I had it to do over again, I would in a heartbeat.

Soothing Weapons and Tactics

2012-01-12T13:47:00.001-05:00

Got to thinking last night about how police and militia handle crowds. To subdue means to quiet or tone down. Granted, it also means to conquer. But if the real intent were to subjugate a crowd, why is it that the most violent means are used? Think of the use of firehoses on the civil rights demonstrators of the 60s.

Wouldn't it be more efficient to subdue by using ether or the aerial spraying of Valium or Prosac or even marijuana (Can marijuana be sprayed?)? How about nitrous oxide and everyone could have a good laugh and maybe get their teeth cleaned at the same time? SWAT teams wouldn't even have to change their initials.

On the Mend and Pigskin!

2012-01-09T22:37:00.000-05:00

I snapped the header photo when I was down on Eastern Shore, just on the other side of the Bay Bridge on Piney Narrows. Was so surprised that I could actually see the nest and the fledgling osprey.

I'm feeling a little better each day. I had read someplace that they weren't sure that the vaccines developed for this year's influenza were appropriate, so I had to just go ahead and try out their theory. Would you know they were right? Tamiflu helped a lot though negating the high fever, chills, and body aches within 24 hours. Now I'm dealing with the cough. I have a great prescription cough syrup that works beautifully, but pretty much renders me stupid.

And no there's been no knee surgery. It had to be postponed several times. And, yes, it's been re-scheduled, but I'm not telling anyone until it's over. Too many false starts.

I so loved watching Denver beat Pittsburgh yesterday. I'm not a Tebow fan, but I will cheer on anyone who can take down Roethlisberger and his two different colored shoes. The injured foot had on a size 15 and the healthy foot, a size 14. But why have on two different colors? To call attention to his injury? So the other team knows which ankle to kick? So he can remember his left from his right? A veritable mystery. I'm not sure how Denver will do against New England on Saturday (actually, I'm pretty sure how they'll do and it isn't pretty) and how our Ravens will do against Texas on Sunday, but I'll be watching.

And We're Off!!!

2012-01-03T12:41:00.000-05:00

We enjoyed a lovely Christmas -- especially Christmas Eve when we gathered at son and DILs home for lasagna, presents, chaos, and Italian cookies. Christmas Day was quieter; we stopped in to see Ariana and give her some presents Santa had left for her at our house. I spent most of that time wiping her schnooky nose and playing with her new fairy house.

On Monday, I went to the gym had a fantastic workout in spite of my misbehaving knee, came home, made chicken piccata, cleaned up, and sneezed about 20 times....Hmmm, never done that before. Then I started to cough -- just a little at first. By 12:00 AM I had a fever of 102.5°, was shaking with chills and suffering from body aches. It seems that little, schnooky-nosed elf had brought me the flu.

A week and a half and two postponed surgery dates later. I'm still here with the remnants of a cough and a sinus infection. Let's just say I'm able to get a lot of reading done. Did I mention on New Year's Eve I was in bed by 7:30? I waited as long as I could.

The surgery has been re-scheduled for Thursday. Whether I make it or not is anyone's guess.

It's All Good

2011-12-20T20:05:00.000-05:00

We all know that when we try to impart wisdom to our children, we're never really sure if and when it's absorbed. I strongly believe that behavior is like language. In order for a child to learn language, he or she needs to hear the particulars at least 25 times. So when Melissa was a teenager, we would practice affirmations such as "I work very hard to achieve my goals," "I frequently am kind to others", et cetera. I figured it couldn't hurt and it also helped me in dealing with her teenage self.

While bathing three-year old Ariana tonight, Melissa thought it a good time to start with a positive litany -- one like that in The Help when the maid tries to improve the self-esteem of her charge. And so Melissa said to her, "You're kind, gentle and..." and before Melissa could finish, Ariana added, "And I don't hug people's privates." Stifling her laughter as best she could, Melissa said, "Well, yes, there's that, too."

Enjoy!

2011-12-12T14:09:00.000-05:00

The outside of the house is finished; the inside -- almost. I'm hand-writing cards this year instead of printing out address labels (this is actually 'fun' for me), saying "Merry Christmas" to everyone I see, boycotting any place that uses "Xmas" in their ads, (is there anyone else out there that hates this as much as I do?), and not doing any baking this year as I live by the rule, "If I bake it; I eat it" and frankly I've never met a cookie I didn't like. Thus, the fear that my hips will rival the size of Montana (the state; not Joe) and need to be declared a separate territory.

I feel remiss, but we're not doing a lot of shopping this year. I mean, shouldn't I be doing something more for the economy? But we exchange gifts only with our children, grands, husband's dad and my mom and this year the kids have requested specific gifts or our 'chipping in' for something in particular -- so actually there's not a whole lot to buy. I'll probably get some stocking stuffers, but that's about it. Come to think of it, what a blessing this is; what a novel idea: just enjoying the season!

It's Double-Edged

2011-12-07T09:37:00.000-05:00

For some who have never had children or had a special contact with them it may be hard to understand that not only do we suffer the hurts, slings, and arrows of our own lives, but we do so doubly: every time those weapons are focused on our children. In fact, I'd venture to say that we might have managed being stood-up in the 10th grade, but when it happens to one of our teenagers, the slight hurts even more. And while our kids do not define who we are; they definitely define who we "be". Simply put: When the kids ain't happy, the parents ain't happy.

Let me be clearer. We have a lot of joy in our lives. Son and daughter-in-law are expecting a baby boy in January. We laugh a lot with our three kids and enjoy their company; their humor. As I've mentioned before, daughter #1, son, and DIL work for the family business so it's not like we have limited connections. Shoot -- they all know the combination to the garage door opener!

Yesterday, my sweet, gorgeous 225 lb., EMT, hero of a son was reduced to tears. He had had to put Hook, a sweet, retired thoroughbred horse, down. Hook had been ailing, but when Michael went into his stall yesterday, Hook had lay down and was unable to get up. It was time. And not to be unduly gruesome, but when a horse is euthanized, it's not like you can flush them down the toilet so Michael and Jennie will be dealing with that today. We feel for them both; us all.

Eat Quickly; Clear The Table; And Shop?

2011-11-26T11:12:00.001-05:00

I don't subscribe to the idea of shedding my humanity to get a good deal on something. Actually, that's not stated strongly enough. I think the idea of Black Friday is irresponsible. Dangling "great buys" in front of people already suffering the consequences of greedy bankers, investors, and legislators in a distressed economy smacks of immorality and appeals to the worst instincts in all of us.

And the "deals" -- are they really that good? Consumer experts tend to think not. Oftentimes the product quality of these 'specials' is suspect; the quantity of the items is limited.

If stores want to attract buyers, why not offer savings for the entire month before Christmas? Would this not be more profitable? Safer? Create less chaos?

Gee, I have an idea...what if we all showed some respect and reverence for Thanksgiving which has now become just a springboard for obnoxious commercials and the stampeding over other shoppers to get to those 'great' deals? Anybody want to lead that charge? Target? Walmart? Anybody?

All I Want For Christmas...

2011-11-14T22:37:00.002-05:00

And as if Cheryl's news wasn't enough...our year from hell continues.

On Friday, I attended the viewing of a good friend who died last week from a heart attack. I spoke with his widow and son (a young man to whom I taught 9th grade English) and expressed my sadness at their loss. I left the funeral home and promptly backed into one of the hearses. I got out of the car, surveyed the damage, and went back inside to introduce myself to the owner and tell him I had just hit one of his cars.

On Saturday, I got up out of bed and discovered my knee would not hold weight (this has NOTHING to do with the accident -- was going way too slowly to have hurt myself or anyone else). It got better as the day went on, but was extremely painful. When I was able to walk, I did so with a marked limp.

I've been receiving palliative treatment for my left knee in which I have advanced arthritis and arthritis in the knee cap itself. I had arthroscopy to repair the medial meniscus some time ago, but actually, there was nothing left to attach it to. My surgeon is a wonderful doctor: kind, a great listener, competent, and compassionate. And frankly in the past ten years this man has seen more of me than my husband.

In the past he's ordered physical therapy (which I attended religiously) Hyalgan shots (which worked for a few years), and cortisone shots, all of which have reduced both pain and swelling and have allowed me to continue my activity. I've tried EVERYTHING. Anti-inflamatories, magnets, glucosamine and today my knee, the doctor and I had a come to Jesus meeting. My knee replacement surgery is scheduled for December.

I had hoped to go a few more months than four without surgery and general anesthesia, but I realize that slowing down is only going to make my arthritis worse AND putting this off any longer will do more damage to the surrounding area. And so here I go again.

PS I forgot to say -- and this is of paramount importance -- that in spite of all this, I feel wonderful and I feel blessed. These things are all just annoyances. But thanks for listening to me. :)

Rise (well not right away) and Shine!!

2011-11-09T13:51:00.000-05:00

I don't get up right away in the mornings. Sometimes I snuggle down in my nest and just think of things. It's when I process 'stuff' and ideas come to me: the blogs I've read the day before; the unspoken in a conversation; the intent of something said; the idea for a poem, a letter, a blog; mornings spent on the Sarasota/Siesta Key beach; friends we'd like to get together with... Retirement has afforded me the luxury of these thoughtful moments.

The last of my roses...

Our maple tree has finally turned color...

And a mourning dove above...

♫♫C'mon People Now; Smile On Your Brother, Everybody Get Together♫♫

2011-11-04T20:44:00.001-04:00

Well the computer issues are resolved (my mouth to God's ear). Much of the problem were updates that were waiting in some clandestine line to happen. Accessing, reading, and commenting on all of your blogs was being thwarted by Firefox. The updates are accomplished and I have a new browser and new security installed.

I played hooky today from the gym and my boxing session. What I did do was finish writing/stuffing/and mailing the invitations to my DIL's baby shower and made a vegetable run to Trader Joe's where I bought shrimp, a fennel bulb, butternut squash, and a bag of broccoli and cauliflower florets. We had a very veggie dinner tonight in front of a roaring fire (purposeful) ☺. Now it's only 8:15 and feels like it's midnight. This early darkness makes me want to hibernate.

We attended a Halloween Parade on Monday at the little one's school. So cute. All of the kids 'marched' out of the school building into the courtyard where skads of parents/grandparents awaited. The wee ones looked a bit overwhelmed but caught on quickly and were all so adorable.

Ariana shocked us by wearing the whole costume -- including the wig.

Here's another parade -- no candy, though. Richard snapped this while he was doing an audit in DC. Our Democracy in action. Reminds me of the 60s. Peace and far out!!

At Least There Are No Stink Bugs

2011-10-30T10:17:00.001-04:00

It's been a few weeks -- maybe a month -- that I was able to pull up all the blogs I follow and comment. My computer allows me to do one or two and then blocks EVERYTHING! I suspect it's something in the security settings of my computer. I've not been able to detect exactly where, but believe me it is a pain in the ass. Bloggerland is not the only place I'm having trouble, it's now stopping me from accessing a few of my other favorite sites. Time to call in a nerd...

We had snow yesterday, but no appreciable accumulation. Our daughter, however, who lives only 10 minutes north of here had about 3". Go figure. Everyone says this is a harbinger of things to come. Certainly the people in states north of here who are digging their way out are wondering. I'm not so sure. I tend to think this will be a mild winter. Why? Two reasons: the law of averages says we're due one, and more importantly, we had 2 cords of wood delivered.

Yesterday was fun, though, as we found ourselves getting into the Christmas spirit -- never mind that the impatiens are still blooming (albeit snow-covered) and the leaves are still on the trees and haven't even changed color, yet. Today, by the way, is GLORIOUS -- gorgeous blue, cloudless skies and about 39°. And yes, we have fires going...

This evening we're attending a home concert -- something offered in our area. These are fun. The host engages an artist and invites 20 couples to dinner (everyone brings something to share) and a concert for a nominal fee. We've heard some great artists and met some very nice people. Tonight I'm bringing "Outrageous Brownies" -- a Barefoot Contessa recipe that is off the charts. It calls for a pound of butter and about two and a half pounds of chocolate -- and a side of insulin. People usually love these and I'm hoping to bring home an empty tray. Wish you could join us.

Tailgating with Ed an Ame

2011-10-16T21:26:00.000-04:00

Thank you all for your kind words and condolences.

We're all doing well (knocking loudly on wood). It's a glorious day here in Maryland and we're spending the day doing 'stuff' we want to. We've filled the bird feeders (need to get a new one, the squirrels ate our 'squirrel proof' feeder, sat outside in 65º degree weather, and we're 'getting 'ready' to watch the Eagles and Ravens this afternoon. We'll be feasting on veggie wraps; a faro, corn, edaname and cilantro salad; and an Asian slaw. Yes, we're tailgating in our family room. How soon can you all get here?

It's really interesting to me that as the weather begins to cool, I get the cooking/baking bug again. It happens every year. I revert to 'primitive woman' girding up for a long, cold winter. I don't think it coincidence as the leaves fall and the perennials go underground that I begin to crave and want to prepare root vegetables like carrots, sweet potatoes and the like.

Faro, Corn and Edaname Salad

Veggie Wrap & Asian Slaw

To Everything There Is A Season

2011-10-13T20:00:00.000-04:00

I think the planning is done. I met yesterday with the person in charge at the church and we went over every detail of my mother-in-law's funeral Mass. She was pretty specific before she died about what she wanted and didn't want, which really made it a lot easier on me. She wanted included with "Ave Maria" and other hymns two songs: "Always" and "Leaving on a Jet Plane". The former was her and my FIL's favorite song; the latter was a song that the basketball team she took to the finals in 1976 wrote different/ germane lyrics to. Several of the players are going to sing this during the Mass.

There was a huge surprise during the meeting: we had been told that the ladies of the parish would take care of the food. Father was mistaken -- they don't at all. So yesterday I was scrambling for a caterer. Found a great one with my husband and DIL's help and have even received the contract already. WHEW!!

Hilda wanted me to write her obituary - (already run in the local papers, The Baltimore Sun, and The Washington Post) - and the eulogy which I will deliver at the end of the Mass. I tried to include in the Mass readings that would comfort and uplift including the Prayer of St. Francis and Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. The Mass is not until the 22nd so at least for now, I'm feeling on top of things.

Season's Change

2011-10-06T10:24:00.000-04:00

It's been a while since I've had the time and inclination to visit blogs and to actually write. Forgive me. My MIL who has been fighting cancer for three years died Tuesday night. And while she passed with dignity and was comfortable to the end, we are totally stunned and drained. Now we know what anemia feels like.

Playing Kathy and Dick

2011-09-27T10:43:00.001-04:00

"Sassa, let's play Kathy and Dick." And so Michael and Melissa, then four and three, would head for the nearest table or a large closet, where they would set up "their kids" -- their Cabbage Patch babies all in a line -- and go on a "road trip". (Robyn, age one, would wait a year or so before they would entice her into the dog's crate, and take her along on one of their vacations. The dog, a willing player in this tableau, had a car seat with their babies.) They would stop for gas, stop to console, feed or change crying babies, discuss the weather, the traffic, and their various destinations. My husband and I got to see a play back of ourselves in the eyes of our toddlers playing us. Would this have gone on forever. Well, not the Robyn in the crate part...

Thirty years later, it is I who feel like I'm playing at being an adult. Now we talk about how the grand daughters are doing in school, the upcoming birth of our first grandson, the illness or passing of friends.... Lately words and phrases such as "stage four", "terminal", "hospice care", all in reference to my husband's mother, have crept into our dialogues. How we long for the sweetness, the innocence of those earlier days.

Pride Goeth Before the Fall

2011-09-21T09:36:00.000-04:00

Here I was thinking I was 'all that' -- as I'm walking through the Mall looking for the Godiva store. I thought I'd buy the nurses who took care of me some chocolate. I'd fixed my hair, was wearing my favorite color top -- turquoise (do they still call it that?) and a pair of black 'pedal pushers' (do they still call them that?²)

In spite of the directory and the internet directions (and my memory), the store was not there, but replaced by a huge sign "GODIVA CHOCOLATIERS -- COMING SOON!!" This was just bizarre -- sort of backwards deja vu.

So I strutted my stuff over to Macy's and Nordstrom's to no avail. They had Godiva stuff, but not what I had in mind. I decided to go home and order it off the internet.

When I got home I changed my clothes to discover the whole time I was out one of my fuzzy slipper socks was caught in my pant leg in what must have looked like a large growth on the back of my leg. Cute, huh?

Twenty Five Years Later

2011-09-14T22:34:00.000-04:00

My mentor teacher was a lovely woman. She and her husband, knowing we had no family close by, included my new groom and I in her family's plans attending local oyster roasts or fairs. We lived and I student taught in a rather conservative community, in the middle of what is known as the Pennsylvania Bible Belt where many belonged to evangelical-type churches. This was not an integrated community -- in any sense of that word. One was either white and Christian or -- well, there wasn't anything else.

When Mrs. E learned that I'd be moving to Baltimore County to teach in the public schools there, she was upset. She said she didn't know if she could ever live in an area or teach in a school with so many who did not share her beliefs.

Her statement came back to me almost 25 years later when a friend with whom I'd attended school in suburban Philadelphia visited me at school and described the high school I was teaching in as the 'United Nations'. (He would know as he had been an aide to Madeline Albright). He'd never seen anything like it: kids and teachers, my friends, of every hue, nationality, and ethnic background walked the halls together. Gays, straights, orthodox Jews, born again Christians and girls in veils all had learned to co-exist. I take pride in the diversity of the community in which I live; I don't think I could be happy anywhere else. My children, having been raised here, learned tolerance at an early age and now carry that idea to their own children. This is normal to them.

I know this is not commonplace; that people tend to tribe with folk of the same ilk. It's comforting and safe. But, I think it's also dangerous as it perpetuates separatism and lack of understanding.

The Real Housewives

2011-09-07T20:45:00.000-04:00

I've explained before that the cardio room at the gym has six or 7 TVs and that sometimes I'm forced to see things I wouldn't choose -- like Fox News or today's topic "Real Housewives of Wherever".

I'm aware this is a popular show with many, but you'll not find a fan in this house. In fact, I think the whole idea, whether based in Atlanta, New Jersey, or Beverly Hills, is insulting and denigrating to real women everywhere. Okay, admittedly, I'm not a fan of reality TV of any kind and find most of it -- or the basic idea of it -- exploitive and demeaning. And the women featured in these shows are neither real nor worthy of our attention.

If I were to write a series featuring The Real Housewives of _______ (fill in the blank), I'd feature the women I know who are not only managing a home and raising children, but are out working sometimes two jobs to pay a mortgage. These heroines are not worried about throwing parties that make the decadent and declining Roman Empire appear staid. Real housewives strive to make enough money to pay for health care for their families; they take the time to teach their kids real values, while often facing the responsibility of caring for aging parents. This is as real as it gets.

Lutheran Airlines

2011-09-06T10:57:00.000-04:00

Thanks to my friend and neighbor, Ermina. I almost never re-post this kind of thing, but this one I just had to! There's no picture, just audio. Give it a listen.

http://dauckster.posterous.com/lutheran-airlines-fg-audio-only

"Like Branches After A Storm"

2011-08-30T16:23:00.001-04:00

My title is a line from a Ted Kooser poem "Abandoned Farmhouse". The poem is one of my favorites. When I saw our back yard on Sunday after Irene had passed through, the first thing I thought of was this particular line.

Relatively, we are unscathed and quite lucky. We never lost power, although most around us did on Saturday. Many, including our daughter, will not have power restored until Friday at the earliest as residences are 'down the list' after government agencies and schools. So she and our grand daughter are staying with us. On Sunday she and her neighbors had an impromptu block party. Melissa pulled out her grill and she and her friends cooked everything in their refrigerators and freezers as food was defrosting quickly. Someone must have seen the smoke and called the fire department, who were good-natured and let all the little ones sit up on the truck and ran the lights and sirens.

After my having a colon re-section and fistula repair, complications, a 5.8 earthquake, daughter Robyn's barn being hit by lightning, her suffering an allergic re-action to sulphur's being released into their well (due to the earthquake), and then Hurricane Irene, I think I can say it's been an interesting summer. C'mon fall!

FI FIE FO FUM!!!

2011-08-25T09:49:00.000-04:00

Living with a toddler is like living with a tape recorder, one that plays back at the least expected times.

At the onset of the earthquake the other day, Ariana's nanny (she's from California!) grabbed her and they went under a rather sturdy dining room table. As they lay on the floor, the house shaking around them, our cherub looked up at her and said, "So where's the giant?"

Well we're buffing up the ark and preparing for the Great Winds of 2011 and a visit from Irene. My goodness, it's been an interesting summer.

She's Alive!!!

2011-08-18T21:15:00.001-04:00

Thank you all for your prayers, notes, cards and well wishes. They've all meant very, very much to me.

It's been a very eventful past three weeks. The surgery to remove part of the sigmoid colon went well as did the repair of the fistula. Getting to these areas, however, took about four more hours than anticipated due to scar tissue and I lost a lot of blood, but was up and relatively conscious that night.

Discharged the following Tuesday, I spent a few days at home unsuccessfully trying to manage increasing pain and on Sunday was readmitted through the ER with a blockage (what was eventually diagnosed as a seroma which is a build-up of fluid around the incision). The blockage was drained on Wednesday and I was discharged again on Thursday -- so I've been home for a week during which time I've been working hard on just feeling normal. My appetite is just beginning to return after being NPO (nothing by mouth) for almost two weeks. At one point I offered a nurse $500.00 for a piece of ice. He turned me down!

Tonight is the first night I've joined you all; the first night I've been able to concentrate for longer than just a few minutes. I've missed you.

Be Back Soon

2011-07-28T17:26:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm ready. And by this time tomorrow, I should be out of surgery and on my way back to the active me.

Over the last few days, I've exercised, been 'acupunctured' and massaged. I've cleaned floors and bathrooms, weeded, done laundry and prepared for this part of my journey as best I can. My acupuncturist tells me I am deeply healthy and joyful and I believe this is true.

I will miss you all, and will catch up as soon as I can.

And I need a favor...Do you remember our young friend, Forrest who suffered the brain injury? He is in need of our fervent prayers. If you don't pray, please send your most powerful and positive thoughts his way. This weekend he will be undergoing yet another surgery to relieve the build-up of fluid in his brain.

The weather Outside is Frightful ♫

2011-07-24T15:48:00.001-04:00

Di at "Blue Ridge Girl" has declared that it is now winter. And to prove it....here's our patio...

And Richard going to get yet more wood to keep us warm...

And the County plow getting stuck!

And the view from my window...

Feel better, everyone? I know I do. I think I'll go outside to roll around in all that white stuff!

This Livin' Aint Exactly Easy

2011-07-21T11:55:00.001-04:00

Thank you all for your great thoughts toward my upcoming 'event'. The oddity with this thing is that I feel fantastic. I know, though, that this has to be done. I can be heard singing, "♫There's a hole in my colon, dear Liza, dear Liza...♫" And I still can't understand why Big Guy was upset with the pictures from the colonoscopy that I put up on the refrigerator...

It is hotter than Hell here and across the country with heat indices for today and tomorrow well past 100°. As I rode around this morning at 9 getting all my errands out of the way, it was already 89°. If there were ever two days designed for sitting in a corner over/under the AC vent, these are they! Our house is closed tight; shutters and shades drawn; lights off. I made a batch of gazpacho that sits 'marrying' in the refrigerator. That and some cold shrimp will be dinner. I feel so badly for all those who must work outside and pray for all of them. In the words of my sweet dad, "Fa Caldo"!

Another Opening; Another Show

2011-07-19T09:59:00.000-04:00

I think I have to get a new hobby or I'll just chalk this up to maintenance and upkeep.

The birthday/diverticulitis occurrence caused some problems, ones that can only be fixed surgically, so I will return to the operating theater on July 29th to have part of my colon removed and a fistula repaired. I'm ready, feel deeply well, and look on this as a challenge.

The surgeon will use the same site/ the scar line of the radical hysterectomy that removed the ovarian cancer. The surgery will take a few hours, I'll be hospitalized for a few days, and the recovery will take about six weeks. (A simpler, laparoscopic surgery is not an option because of the amount of scar tissue from the other surgery.)

Am I nervous? A little, but I'm readying myself this week and next with acupuncture treatments and plans for treatments after surgery to promote healing and conquer pain. I'm also doing more stretching, cardio and weight training to get my body ready for the ordeal. I've met with the anesthesiologist and the surgeon and both have been supportive and informative and I have confidence in both of them. We're lucky that we live in a part of the country where medical care is exemplary.

The bad news is I'll be out of the blogosphere for a while (from the 29th until the 3rd or 4th) as I don't have a laptop. The good news...I'll have put the diveritculosis/itis at bay and this surgery has to be good for another 10 pound loss!!! :) See, my glass is definitely always half full!

A Bowl of Cherries

2011-07-17T21:10:00.000-04:00

We visited my mom yesterday. It's always fun going up to see her. We laugh, we talk, we have great cheesesteaks for lunch. I'm thankful to still have her in my life. She's an amazing woman and a fantastic mother -- one that NOTHING gets by -- who at 85 is more active than some people half her age. She sings in three choirs, belongs to a political discussion group, the Italian Club, plays baci and wii bowls.

She hadn't seen me around my birthday and so presented me with a lovely pair of earrings and a bowl of gorgeous cherries. These have some significance -- right after she had given birth to me, her mother showed up at the hospital with a bag of cherries to celebrate my being born. My mom said she wasn't sure what she was more excited about, that she had her first grand child or she was able to get such beautiful fruit! (I can just picture my 'Mom Mom", all 4'9" of this wiry Italian lady whose English wasn't real good, coming into that hospital in South Philadelphia like the dynamo that she was).

Belated But Yummy

2011-07-10T20:12:00.000-04:00

We had a milestone here last Sunday. Big Guy made me a birthday cake -- his first cake. It turned out phenomenally better than this photo. Sorry about the focus, but I had to share the photo -- (we weren't sharing the cake!) :) I did act as prep chef completing the mis en place, but he did the rest, including frosting this baby!!

♫ I've Grown Accustomed To Their Stink ♫ (with apologies to Lerner and Loewe)

2011-07-06T08:35:00.001-04:00

Just as quickly as they appeared, they are gone, a few carcasses left behind. I'm talking about the stink bugs that have plagued (in every sense of that word) us for the past two years.

When we returned from Florida there were not hundreds of them on our screens, on the cedar siding, on our fireplace screen, and our vacuum (their only known predator) sat unused.

So where did they go? Are they coming back?

And Speaking of Narcissism

2011-07-03T22:50:00.000-04:00

We were able to vacation early this year. The first week of June we drove down to Siesta Key, near Sarasota and spent a lovely week in a condo on the beach. A nice way to celebrate my 60th birthday. :) Yes, 60. I can't believe it; I really can't. Richard did us both a favor by taking all the sharp objects out of the condo. I spent most of the day like this...

Under a hat and smeared with 70 SPF and up to my neck in the Gulf of Mexico, refusing to come out of the water.

The rest of the day I spent on the phone with my doctor getting a prescription for diverticulitis that found me on that same day. Yes, I really know how to have a good time. :)

Is There Medication For Narcissism? A Telethon?

2011-06-19T20:25:00.000-04:00

I realize that in the scheme of things, our recent experience with Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines is not an important one; an annoyance, yes, but really nothing more. We've made other accommodations on Holland America and will be getting our deposit back from RC (hitherto not to be named) shortly.
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According to an article I read in The Week concerning a study out of Stamford University, narcissism has a real and growing presence in our country. This doesn't come as a surprise. Everywhere we look we see evidence of the "It's all about me" generation. That woman who after 16 hours of talking disturbingly loudly into her cell phone, pleas from fellow passengers, threats from conductors, was finally removed from the train and arrested could easily be the poster child for narcissism. It was all about her.

Unfortunately, she'd have to make room for a host of others such as those appearing on The Maury Povich and Jerry Springer "shows" (and I use this term loosely). I'm not a fan of these shows that appeal to the lowest common denominator in human life, but I have been subjected to them while at the gym (and have sweetly requested the channel be changed). For what other possible reason but self aggrandizement could the guests on these shows that have absolutely no socially redeeming quality appear before so many? Again, it's all about them... To hell with human dignity!

And don't even get me started on Anthony Weiner (the man needs to change his name) and the likes of John Edwards, Gary Hart, Arnold and countless others who need to flaunt their 'parts' in one way or another to make themselves known. Clearly, it was all about them. And then there's the Madoffs of this world...

How to Lose Business Quickly

2011-06-14T20:45:00.000-04:00

Even though we shared the driving, the trip home from Atlanta was exhausting. After unpacking the car, opening up the house, and feeding the cat, we sat down to a dinner of chicken satay -- and although tired, we were joyful with the experiences of the past week having met friends for lunch in Savannah, a great week at the beach in Siesta Key, and then the two days visiting my brother and sister-in-law in Atlanta on the way back. The ringing phone was an annoyance, but nothing compared to what the call would bring.

We've been so excited about our cruise from Barcelona to Venice. We booked this several months ago for April of next year to celebrate our 40th anniversary. (We were married when I was two). Margie and Dave and my brother and SIL, Jay and Nancy Blair, were joining us and we were a week away from making our flight arrangements. And then Royal Caribbean called to tell us that our trip had been cancelled as the corporate big wigs had decided to re-position the ship, on which we were to have traveled, to China. They were replacing the ship with a smaller one, but that cruise wouldn't debark until June and they could not promise us the accommodations would be the same. If we chose another cruise we would have to realize any difference in pricing. BUT, they were going to give us $400 (total) for on board spending. (Can you hear me yelling, "Big, freakin' whoop"?)

Royal Caribbean could have handled this so much better. It is obvious to us that absolutely no planning had gone into their contacting us. And so we have a few suggestions for RC:

1. Apologize.

2. Do NOT send the socially inept, the arrogant, cavalier, or a rookie to do a yeoman's job.

3. Contacting customers in writing, first, detailing why the cancellation is occurring and and then following up with a phone call is more responsible than calling people and surprising them with bad news and giving them no viable options.

4. Apologize.

5, Have a plan in place detailing several options and compensating for your changing plans. Making someone change the date of sailing because you want to re-position the ship from Barcelona to China and then telling already disappointed passengers that any other than the one suggested sailing will probably be more expensive and the passenger will have to pay "that prevailing rate" (your words; not ours) is just not good business. We're not looking for 'freebies', but we'll be damned if we're paying more than we would have for an April sailing than during peak season (June) because of YOUR "corporate decision". If we had wanted to cruise in June or July, we would have scheduled a cruise for June or July.

6. Apologize.

We're looking at a few options and a couple of cruise lines that actually want our business.

Crying Bicyles

2011-05-31T08:32:00.002-04:00

I've had another epiphany -- not unlike Lisa Kudrow's character, Phoebe Buffay on Friends when she sang Elton John's wondrous hit: "Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza".

Let me digress for a minute. I began my education with thoughts of being a voice major; I have a trained voice, one that does not lend itself to pop music. Picture/hear this: it would be a lot like hearing Montovani playing something by Twisted Sister. How does this relate to my epiphany? It doesn't; I just thought I'd mention it.

Anyhoodle, as Every Day Jay says. I recently heard Meat Loaf's song, "Two Out Of Three"-- a song I've always liked. Thirty years later, after singing what I thought were the correct lyrics, I've finally learned the real words are, "...but you've been cold to me so long, I'm cryin' icicles instead of tears!!" Who knew??? Well probably everyone but me. The heck with the fact that my version didn't even make sense.

So I wonder now how many memories, how many conversations, how many facts in my own history, for that matter, are totally misconstrued; mis-remembered, skewed? And if I misconstrue, wouldn't it stand to reason that the whole history of the world is as skewed as Emily Latella's take on things. OY! Could be that chrome really was built in a day.

Before and, well... Before

2011-05-29T10:36:00.000-04:00

This garden has continually gotten away from me and has been a real bane for the past 10 years. Well, no more! It's in flux right now and about half done. With a little help from a friend, I removed EVERYTHING, did a quick if not pedestrian plan, and started over. My ~~laborer~~ husband (I dig the holes, he's my 'on the ground guy' -- literally, down in the dirt) is replanting all the day lilies after separating them, replanting monarda (red and purple), and planting some echinacea that I started from seed. He's then broadcasting Preen and mulching. We'll place a stone path down the middle and eventually put a fountain in the center. We have to find one that we like. Yesterday, the two of us looked like a couple of mud runners from Hialeah!

If you don't hear from me for a while or see a suspicious mound in my yard, you'll know that the supervisor/laborer thing didn't go very well. Call 911.

A Rose By Any Other Name Is Still A Nut

2011-05-24T20:35:00.001-04:00

We're only a few days from our first rose 'flush'. To people like myself who love roses, this is a big deal. Pictures to follow.

I mentioned previously that I took a page from the book of Betsy and George and planted a few roses in pots, and am excited about these as well.

There are a few pioneer blooms, too. This is a cabbage rose.

And this is a hybrid tea called A Touch Of Class.

And this is a very special type of rosebud called Pink, Precious, and Pony-tailed.

I am overwhelmed with sadness about the horrid destruction in the heartland of our country. When I see these loses, I realize my troubles are trivial ones. I wonder...does new construction in this part of the country mandate 'safe' areas like storm cellars or safe rooms? These wouldn't abate the destruction, but they would probably save a lot of lives.

And on a completely ludicrous note, when are people simply going to ignore the likes of Harold Camping and his predictions? People actually sent him money and some even began having their pets euthanized. The stupidity of mankind astounds me. How different are his prophecies than the promise of 72 ~~vegans~~ virgins? He's just another Jim Jones, but with a radio station.

All Is Well

2011-05-20T22:30:00.001-04:00

Things are substantially better here than they were this morning. Our daughter, Melissa, and my husband, Richard, have been business partners for 12 years in running CQI - an energy consulting business. Our son and DIL and six others work for the business as well. We're blessed with very talented people, a substantial client list, and a very successful business. They work very hard to service clients and the biggest problem, I think, is that work time sometimes spills over to non-work time. Richard and Melissa often work evenings and weekends -- but such is the need for making sure clients are taken care of -- even when there are family emergencies or 'urgencies'.

Both dogs were found in a state park near Interstate 70! Our daughter-in-law, who has been absolutely relentless, spotted Lily early this morning -- Lily ran from her but Jennie was able to eventually catch her. Jennie found Boh eight hours later; he was up against a fence that borders I70. Tonight we'll ALL be sleeping better.

Down on the Farm

2011-05-15T21:17:00.000-04:00

We didn't get lost this time going to visit our youngest. One must understand when driving in VA that the assumption is that you've been there before -- no need to clearly mark direction or exits. This probably saves them a lot of money -- especially when confused motorists have to get on and off the Dulles Toll Road and pay the tolls each time.

The weather held out for a while, too.

We picnicked in the barn. From the left: Luke's sister, Robyn (youngest child), Luke. Behind Luke are his parents and my husband. On the right is our son, grand daughter, middle child and in the front is 'the baby' who just turned three two weeks ago.

Melissa and the girls loved driving (slowly) around the farm on the ATV.

Two of Robyn's charges...

My girls are multi-talented and can look feminine even when taking a fence and wearing a dress!

Clouds over the Blue Ridge...

And then the rains came!

We toweled off the little ones, changed their clothes and then headed home.

Hellloooo Dolly!

2011-05-13T14:12:00.000-04:00

Dolly Parton is very happy in her container and is proving it by blooming. I only wish you all could smell this rose! If you don't have it in your garden, get thee to a nursery!! I promise you it will be well worth the trip.

Here are a few other shots of the 'early' garden.

Sunday we're all heading down to Virginia horse country to see youngest daughter. It's supposed to rain, but we'll make do and have our picnic in good spirits. Maybe the sun will even peek through for a bit.

Dolly Parton's in the Pot!

2011-05-09T17:04:00.006-04:00

Maryland in May is spectacularly verdant and lush. Today was in the low 70s and absolutely glorious! Our springs are usually short and we dive into 'hot and humid' by this time. This year, however, and at the risk of tempting fate, we've had a prolonged spring with mild temps. It's been pleasant working outside. All but four of my pots are planted and I'll take photos as soon as they start to fill out a bit. I'm also still waiting for the remainder of my order from Park Seed: Cherokee purple heirloom tomatoes and the Gold and Bold Collection of million bells (callibrachoa).

We're again having terrible trouble with the *#^% rabbits. I've tried EVERYTHING -- all the products are 'guaranteed', but the cursed rodents have really gone after my roses. Last year, I did find some success with cat fur -- and Azrielle loved being brushed everyday, but short of shaving her, I won't have enough fur to go around. George and Betsy have planted quite a few roses in containers. I've planted three so far (two floribundas and Dolly Parton hybrid tea, and have one more to go - the JFK hybrid tea - after I receive it from our youngest this weekend. The rabbits will need step ladders to get to them. Gotta get me a fox...

Remember Me?

2011-05-04T10:32:00.000-04:00

I've been outside potting all my leafy friends (not finished, yet, should be soon), going to the gym, preparing dinner for our bookclub (spinach ravioli; cucumber, tomato, Spanish olive, mushroom, onion, chick pea, salad; focaccia; blueberry cobbler and benne wafers for dessert), and scrubbing floors and bathrooms to prepare for said event. We discussed Pat Conroy's South of Broad. I hosted as this was my choice and for me, a re-read; the book is that good. The fact the story takes place in one of my favorite places on earth, Charleston, SC, is a bonus.

What's interesting is that while I immediately picked up the foreshadowing, the complexity of the plot and sub-plots, the amazing characters, I did not characterize the book as "dark", while all the others did. Later, I told my husband what the seven women had emphatically said. His comment, "Of course it is; it's very dark".

So what is it about me that this comes as a revelation? I don't disagree, but in the main character, Leo King, I saw such richness; such amazing strength and hope and compassion. And at the risk of sounding dilusional, maybe that's just the way I am.

Coming Clean

2011-04-27T17:04:00.000-04:00

There's something I haven't been telling you and now I'm ready to spill it all...I've been doing Weight Watchers for over a month. I participate online -- I'm not the kind of person who does well with meetings. It's has been a successful enterprise for me and I've actually enjoyed keeping track of my points and activity at my bookmarked site. Maggie's sharing about Weight Watchers has encouraged me to write about it. I hadn't admitted this to anyone -- including my family and friends. Maybe I was afraid of failing. But now I'm ready...

I'd considered other programs but it gets down to this:

1) This just cannot be for the short-run -- this has to be something I can do for the rest of my life. Programs that provide the food are not realistic for me. I've known people who have lost 50 pounds quickly on one of these diets, and within a few months have gained it ALL back, plus more. Additionally, programs that push all proteins and no carbs are ones at which I am bound to fail.

2) Whatever I do must be healthy and Weight Watchers is that.

3) Any weight loss has to be gradual enough that my skin won't hang from my body. I was watching an episode of "The Biggest Loser" and while I marvel at the weight losses many experienced, their determination, and spirit, I noticed that some of them had skin hanging from their arms. The two in particular that suffered this were contestants who had lost 80 and 101 pounds, respectively, in 14 weeks. I think it's great to see results, but I also think it would kill me emotionally to gain everything I'd lost back and that's exactly what would happen to me if I lost it all that fast. From all I've learned about nutrition, I know that weight loss such as this is not healthy for the heart. It can lead to various arrhythmia and sometimes organ failure.

I figure it will take me almost two years to lose what I want. I haven't been hungry and find myself making cognizant choices. People are starting to notice the weight loss and that's encouraging me even more.

Rockfish and Flying Tigers

2011-04-21T10:50:00.004-04:00

There are three things I must add in reference to the last post:

1. Daughter is exceedingly fit, but the muscle you see in that right arm is due to her holding up her end of the palate on which all those fish rest.

2. I don't eat rock fish. Sorry, just don't like it. I prefer 'thin' filets like sole, tilapia, flounder, and salmon that's been butterflied for me.

3. All of that fish, split evenly among the group, gets eaten. Friends 'line up' to get their fresh filets.

It rained for three of the days we spent in San Diego. So on one of them, we visted the Air and Space Museum in Balboa Park. Fittingly, this museum is directly under the approach path for the airport and we snapped a few pics of arriving flights. We love planes!

Inside we found quite a surprise. Oftentimes, little attention is given to the Army Air Corps' theater in China Burma, where my dad was stationed during WWII. He was a radio operator on C-47's. So when we saw this display, I felt like I was visiting with my dad.

Incidentally, the day my dad died, on June 1 in 1998, our youngest brother, Jay, was in Florida. He would fly to Philadelphia to join us the next day. Jay, when he learned of my dad's death, walked down to the beach for a couple of minutes of solitude. As he sat there he thought he heard the engines of a prop plane. He looked up and right above him flew a C-47. One last mission...

That's Our Girl!!

2011-04-19T17:19:00.000-04:00

Our middle child likes to fish. In fact, she's really good. Looks like someone will be eating rock fish this weekend!

Home By Another Way -- w/ a nod to James Taylor

2011-04-17T11:33:00.000-04:00

Yesterday wasn't just dark and dreary; it was downright frightening. The National Weather Service posted tornado, high wind, severe thunderstorm warnings and flash flood advisories, and while we were spared the tornadoes the rest came to fruition.

We deferred to the ominous skies and frightening winds and stayed in most of the day. I planned 90% of my garden and 'pot-scape', and started on that shopping list (I have to hurry before Richard sends out my picture to local nurseries with a warning "DO NOT SELL TO THIS WOMAN". (I just cast a wider net. VA and PA aren't that far.))

Rains and wind abated last evening and we set out to friends' house for a "Man Cave christening". As we traveled west on I70, we noted that the sky west of us looked almost black. Not a good sign...And then the rains and winds hit us. Unable to see, we pulled over for a short time. We tried again a short time later and decided to call our hostess, turn around and head for home.

Sometimes we just have to re-assess things and change course -- and while this was not an important event, it still served as a lesson.

Fruits of Labor

2011-04-14T12:51:00.001-04:00

The first time I ever saw Kevin was when he was roughing up a 9th grader trying to extract money the younger had placed on a bet. It didn't help the presumption I'd made about Kevin, a junior, much earlier in the school year. There are some kids I would just take an instant disliking to, God forgive me. This didn't happen very often, but it did occur and I'd have to fight to swallow these prejudices all school year, sometimes successfully, and others not so much. I'd have additional dealings with Kevin in the two years until he graduated, none of them very positive.

Twenty years later, Kevin walked into the school where I was still teaching. This time he voluntarily sought me out. " Ms. A, Do you remember the first time we met?" he asked. "I sure do!" I said smiling at the two little girls standing behind him. He introduced me to his daughters. He was so proud and so sweet with them. "I was an idiot," he said. "No, you were a teenager. Mistakes were in your job description." And tolerance was in mine, I thought to myself.

Joshua Tree National Park

2011-04-12T22:32:00.000-04:00

Joshua Tree National Park is several hours southeast of Los Angeles, close to the Arizona border. Our visit this past month was a highlight of a lifetime. Its approximate 790,000 acres contain a variety of terrains and some of the most beautiful sights we've ever seen.

A Joshua tree and many of its smaller friends. Notice the mountains are not composed of hundreds of split boulders yet.

Outcroppings of granite, millions of years old, were pushed up from the earth and when they hit the cold air and moisture, the rocks split into marvelous 'stacked' mountains.

Not Wilma and Fred, but Margie and David. We're about to embark on a mile or so hike...

Here climbers amaze us as we trip over the relatively flat part of the trail.

It looked to us as if the millions of boulders had actually been stacked there.

One of the features of this high point of the park is the view below of the San Andreas Fault. Hard to see because of the haze, but there nonetheless.

In the southernmost part of the park is the huge cacti 'garden' that actually looks over the Mojave and Colorado Deserts to the south.

Soon

2011-04-11T11:15:00.001-04:00

Am feeling really overwhelmed right now with the amount to do in the gardens. Lots of perennials are popping up but so are the weeds. I have to approach this systematically -- clean, weed, mulch gardens in which I won't be planting annuals. We took delivery of 44 bags of mulch on Saturday and husband has started to spread this. Luckily for me, my cold has turned into bronchitis so playing in the mulch is a no-no right now. Too bad :(.

The garden/pot plans are about 70% finished. I'm trying something new this year in that I'll plant a variety of the same color of plant in the same pot -- for example, three colors of mini-petunias (million bells or calibrachoa). I'll share the photos and we'll all see how this works.

We'll have a freakish day of temps in the 80s, but tomorrow should return to the normal 60s. Even so, today's temp should really encourage more growth. The maple is actually 'leafing'.

With any luck, things will look like this, soon....

Kathy, the Red Nosed Pruner

2011-04-07T11:55:00.002-04:00

Thank you for the prayers for Forrest. He's had the surgery, is off the ventilator, and continues to improve.

Yesterday I woke up with a scratchy throat -- a tell tale sign that a cold was on the way. Although I'm happy to say it's been a REALLY long time since I've had a cold, I really dreaded this harbinger knowing what comes next -- the coughing -- inability to sleep through the night because of post-nasal drip -- more like rush than drip. So I'm babying myself for a bit -- lots of fluids, Zicam, Airborne, and no workout today. Tomorrow, yes; today, no.

I might go outside and prune the remaining four rose bushes. I hated cutting off leafy growth, but I really think the bushes will be better for it. I'm also taking a page from Betsy and George's book and planting hybrid teas in a few containers this year. The garden plan is underway and I've made a few changes like the addition of a mandevilla and a trumpet flower. Pictures to follow after planting.

Two nights ago, we booked a cruise that starts in Barcelona and goes to Provence, Corsica, Livorna, Rome, Naples, Sicily, Croatia, Slovenia, Ravenna and Venice. We're very excited! Our travel buddies, Margie and Dave, are going, and we may be joined by my brother and SIL. The cruise isn't for a year so we have a lot of time to save up and also plan.

Good Thoughts Needed

2011-04-05T14:51:00.000-04:00

Forrest, our young friend recuperating from the traumatic brain injury (TBI) was doing quite well until about a week ago, but must undergo yet another brain surgery today. He is at Emory University Hospital in Atlanta. I'm sure his doctors, nurses, and family would appreciate your prayers.

This is what greeted me today; one of the orchids on my desk is in full bloom -- proof positive of hope.

A Promise and a Song

2011-04-02T13:09:00.000-04:00

Some of the responses from the last post surprised and saddened me a little. So many of you never had the opportunity to learn to swim or seem to enjoy the water as much as I, a confirmed water rat. If you're ever in the neighborhood, I'll find a pool and we'll swim. I promise.

Another song has grabbed a hold of me and I cannot get it out of my head. So I downloaded it onto my IPod, and have been listening and listening... John Michael Murphy did a version of this as did Cher. The one I like the best is by Manfred Mann. The drums, I think, captured me at first, but then I became captivated by the lyrics: "Oh Boys, take me back, I want to ride in Geronimo's Cadillac..."

After some mini-research, I learned that in 1905, while imprisoned in Oklahoma, Geronimo was dressed in 'white man' clothes and paraded in front of photographers with a few 'friends' in not a cadillac but a 'locomobile' -- supposedly a big deal as far as cars go in that day. The song laments the degradation of Geronimo... The last verse is,

"They put Geronimo in jail down South
Where he couldn't look a gift horse in a mouth
Sergeant, Sergeant don't you feel
There's something wrong with your automobile
Warden, Warden, listen to me
Be brave and set Geronimo free
Governor, Governor, ain't it strange
You never see a car on the Indian range".

If you ever get the inkling and opportunity, take a listen to the Manfred Mann version of Geronimo's Cadillac.

She's Doing Swimmingly

2011-03-31T20:48:00.001-04:00

I began my teaching career when I was 15 years old, passed the Red Cross lifeguard tests, and was hired to teach swimming at our local Y. I taught children and on one occasion had adult students. My parents had insisted I learn to swim at an early age and I'm thankful they did.

My children learned to swim about the same time they learned to walk. Were they enthusiastic about swimming? No. Did I have to leave the pool when our Michael, who every time he was supposed to take a breath while doing freestyle, chose instead to issue forth a blood-curdling scream? And did I ignore Robyn when at three, she tried to convince the instructor that she simply wasn't ready? Of course I did. But I also know that close to 1400 children die each year from drowning. Add to this the impairments suffered from the effects of near-drowning accidents.

And so the family legacy goes on. Kylie, our 11 year old grand daughter, is an excellent swimmer and has been swimming since she was two. The baby is now in lessons. She resists, but we all know how important it is to 'drown proof' our children.

Getting High or A Little Outside Our Comfort Zone

2011-03-29T13:37:00.000-04:00

We decided that a tram ride up Mount San Jacinto would be fun. All I could say when I first saw this from the ground was "Holy %$#@" and "Mother of God"! Believe me, it looked substantially more foreboding standing at the bottom of that 8600 feet of magnificent mountain.

The ride up the mountain takes only 10 minutes and the views from the top were spectacular. The temperature at the bottom was 88° and only 41° with very brisk winds at the top.

That little tram, built in Switzerland, holds 80 people!

The Coachella Valley...

Lovin' California

2011-03-27T14:11:00.002-04:00

The laundry is done; the suitcases put away (at least mine are - Husb is flying out again tonight), the pictures are burned onto a disc, I've caught up on everyone's blog, and my desk is a mountain of mess.

We dodged the snow bullet last night and suffered only a dusting; today we continue with spring's bursting around us. Helleborus, forsythia, dicentra --♫ March is busting out all over ♫. Now if the temperatures would just rise a bit. (Remind me I've said this when it's 90° here with matching humidity).

My sleep cycle is still off from being on the Left Coast; I can't get to sleep at night and then wake up on California time. This should end soon especially since I'll return to the gym tomorrow. I intend to exercise myself into East Coast time.

Thought I'd share a few photos...

After Marge and Dave picked us up at the airport, we went to dinner at C Level on Harbor Island where we caught up and shared this spectacular view of San Diego.

Can you see the marine layer hovering over Point Loma, the Navy base, and then progressing toward downtown?

It dissipated as quickly as it appeared.

The next day we had a wonderful b-fast at To The Point.

And then headed for Palm Springs and the Coachella Valley. I shot these out the car window on the way...

We were greeted along the way by the 'waves' of these happy wind turbines.

I'll Read Them All, Promise...

2011-03-22T13:42:00.000-04:00

I'm posting without catching up on all your great blogs. Have read a few, but working on this small computer is just too difficult as it frequently throws fits. I'll catch up on reading after we get back.

Tonight is our last night in San Diego. I'll be very sorry to leave and have expressed, much to husband's chagrin, many, many times how much I'd love to live here. I know that won't be happeneing...unless we win that lottery. Like I said, I know that won't be happening.

After a great b-fast with Margie and Dave at the Naked Cafe (where we were all clothed), we're off today to take photos of the La Jolla shore. We'll meet with them for our last dinner.

We've crammed so much into this week. Yesterday we visited the Air and Space Museum (where we saw replicas of the planes my dad flew during the China Burma Campaign (he was a navigator in a C-51))and the Conservatory gardens in Balboa Park. We also had the fantastic fish tacos at South Beach in Ocean Beach. I must confess that husband, M & D succumbed to going there just to shut me up. We've gone there each time we've come out here and the fish tacos are the best we've ever had. Everyone enjoys South Beach, but admittedly, I'm like a dog with a bone...

Wagons, Ho!!!

2011-03-17T00:17:00.000-04:00

The comments on my ceramic, bue mushroom were very interesting! It's one of a four piece garden set my sweet DIL gave us.

At the suggestion of some of you, I sent the last post on to Roger Goodell. I don't expect a response.

We arrived in San Diego yesterday. It was a totally booked flight -- on Southwest (where the only difference between boarding and cattle drives is the mooing). Sitting wedged up against the window, I tried to play solitaire on Richard's computer, but couldn't move my arms -- and the man behind me talked for five solid hours -- loudly! But after landing were picked up by Marge and Dave and taken to dinner at C-level -- fantastic mojitos and great food -- right on Harbor Island overlooking downtown San Diego. A great start to our week.

Today, we went up San Jacinto on the cable car (Pictures to follow) and enjoyed spectacular views of the Coachella Valley from at 8600 feet. We then had dinner at Spencer's where we kind of over-ordered calamari and brought almost all of it home with us. Tomorrow we're going to Joshua Tree National Park and then home for a lunch of left-over calamari. Both should take about four hours.

To And From Roger Goodell; An Exercise in Petulance

2011-03-14T10:38:00.002-04:00

Like many on the NFL mailing list, I received an email from Roger Goodell about his work with the players' union and their walking out of negotiations.

Goodell writes, "While we are disappointed with the union's actions, we remain steadfastly committed to reaching an agreement that serves the best interest of NFL players, clubs and fans, and thank you for your continued support of our League. First and foremost it is your passion for the game that drives us all, and we will not lose sight of this as we continue to work for a deal that works for everyone."

Well Roger, you've really missed the boat. The people you ALL should be apologizing to are not the players, the club owners, or the fans. Who you should be apologizing profusely to are all those who will be financially devastated by this exercise in petulance -- from the ticket takers who work for minimum wage, the food vendors, the small businesses who provide the cups and plates, to those just getting by and are able to put food on their tables by providing services when the games are played -- those often forgotten in these million dollar deals. These are the people from whom you should be begging forgiveness. Frankly, you, the players' union, all of you should be ashamed of yourselves.

To Zoom Or Not To Zoom

2011-03-13T09:56:00.000-04:00

An early riser, the Big Guy, got these great shots.
Although, not our suet feeder thief, this fox enjoys the windfall.

He also got this shot of the rare blue mushroom...

And a 'before zoom' of this hawk...

Have a nice Sunday. We'll be planting two roses and packing for our trip to San Diego!!

If You Want The Best Seat In The House...

2011-03-10T14:14:00.001-05:00

This sign hangs in our sunporch:

The springs on our couch are shot, so we've been looking for a new sofa. Haven't found what I'm looking for, but we did find this great chair and ottoman on Overstock.com. Delivery was just $2.95, believe it or not, and the chair was on sale!!

You think she can read?

And on another animal front...Do you see the suet feeder on this tree?

No? That's because it's GONE! It's the fifth one we've 'lost'. We think the raccoons have a stash of them someplace.

Zippity Doo Dah, Zippity A, My Oh My...

2011-03-07T20:35:00.001-05:00

I'm doing very well; thank you to all who left comments or thought of me. The common consensus around here is that the allergy is to dust and the cleaning out of the closet was the culprit. Really, some of those dresses hadn't been touched in four (4) years. The fact that I was in the grocery store both times is just coincidence.

Yesterday was dark and it poured most of the day. I brightened the day by re-reading That Old Cape Magic by Richard Russo and by sleeping. It was a good day to do both. We'll discuss Russo's book tomorrow night at the other book club to which I belong. I'm sure we'll have lots to talk about; the mother in this book is a real pip. I'm sure some of the other women in the group are really going to react to her as she totally re-defines the term "toxic". Her son, a strong and relatively successful man, is still pretty emotionally crippled by his mother -- about whom the nicest comment I can make is, "Geez, is this woman a bitch!"

On a good note: spring is making its way across Maryland. (Although, one wouldn't have known that at 3:00 AM when I got up and looked out the window to total white-out conditions. It was snowing and snowing hard!) Perennials are beginning to show themselves as are some bulbs. The trees are all budding and the birds are singing loudly. It's almost like a Disney movie out there! And Saturday night, I heard the barred owl for the first time since fall. Time for me to start planning all those pots...

Just Itchin' To Clean Out My Closet

2011-03-04T21:43:00.000-05:00

Maggie put a bee in my bonnet with her de-cluttering and straightening out her shelves so I decided to begin to clean out my closet. I told myself as long as I started it, I could do as little or as much as I wanted. It was easier than I thought and I removed about 30 items of clothing and one pair of shoes. Much of this was 'professional-ware' - some still in the plastic garment bags from the cleaners, and much hadn't been worn in the four (4) years since I retired. It felt good to lighten my load of 'stuff'. I dropped all off at Goodwill -- hoping someone can get use of it.

At the grocery store I felt like I was having a hot flash -- but this wouldn't go away. And then I was having trouble breathing -- my throat felt tight. I used my inhaler, breathed more easily, and continued working my way down my grocery list. When I went to pick up a case of ginger ale, I noticed my hands were beet red. As were my arms, and my legs. I pulled out a mirror and saw my face and chest were red and a mass of hives. Being of a practical nature and in no discomfort other than the itching, I finished my list, went through the checkout, drove home, unloaded the groceries, and drove myself to the ER- only about 10 minutes from here.

This happened about eight (8) years ago and the common denominator is that both allergic reactions began in a grocery store. I carry an epinepherine pen with me because even after testing, it was never determined to what I'm am allergic. After five (5) hours, an IV steroid/benedryl drip I'm home, a Caucasian again and -- feeling great. I'll just keep that Benadryl and eppy pen a little closer for a while.

PS Book club was great fun -- super discussion, delicious Russian tea cakes and apple cake.

Some Extra Time to Blog...

2011-03-02T20:23:00.001-05:00

To my friend at Vanilla Bean Baker -- yes "Harry Bauld" IS an oxymoron. The kids always loved that!

And to all -- never, ever, ever, ever do I or would I judge or 'grade' anyone else's writing (unless they're paying me to do so). That part of my life is gone--thankfully. I'm thrilled to read your blogs and comments all.

Well, tonight I did it. All day I'd been preparing for book club, but since we have a cat, we had to have the meeting elsewhere (a couple of our members are allergic). Since it was my turn to lead the discussion, I spent the day re-reading Kristin Hannah's Winter Garden, making notes, and since the main characters owned an apple orchard, I made an apple cake.

At six, I changed, gathered the book, the cake, and some decaf green tea I thought we could serve, and set out. I knocked on the door, my friend answered and informed me that we were meeting tomorrow night. I had copied the date down wrong on all six of the calendars in this house...Sheesh.

You Can Take The Teacher Out Of The Classroom...

2011-02-28T10:23:00.001-05:00

One of the great aspects of teaching is that the teacher, if she's doing her job correctly, often learns stuff -- good stuff. It's no surprise that teaching the dreaded and feared "College Essay" greatly affected my writing style. But, let's face it, you'd have to be a hanging salami not to absorb something you taught 80 or 90 times.

It's always good to have actual models when you teach. I would write purposefully wanting essays full of the horrible mistakes I wanted the kids to avoid, show the essay on the overhead projector and have the kids tear it apart. At first they would show restraint -- fearful of criticizing something I'd written (they were also a bit confounded that their teacher could have written something so lacking) and often times I'd have to get them started. Then I'd put a well-written model of the same essay up there and asked them what the particular differences were. I loved watching the light bulb go on!

Another tool I used was a book I'd come to love, On Writing The College Essay, by Harry Bauld (yes, that's his real name). Sounds horribly dry, doesn't it? The book, not his name. Well, it's funny, entertaining, expertly written, AND relatively short. I learned much about writing from this book -- particularly in the section titled "Trimming the Fat". I was always a soldier in the war on wordiness. Bauld also features a section of essays, "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly" -- essays actually written by college applicants -- some excellent; some less so; some downright God-awful.

So, the offer is on the table...Anybody need to write a college application essay???

Getting Sauced Or Marinara In Winter

2011-02-23T16:40:00.000-05:00

Last summer, as you may recall, was brutally warm. Somehow making fresh marinara sauce and then canning it just did not appeal to me. (It was no accident that old time canning kitchens were outdoors -- separate from the kitchen.) So as we harvested tomatoes, we washed, quartered and froze them with the intent of getting to the canning part in October.

I actually got to it three days ago when I pulled eight bags of frozen tomatoes from the freezer and began to defrost them. When they thawed, I pureed them in the food processor and then sieved the puree to free it from seeds and toughened skin. I added my secret ingredients (basil, crushed garlic and olive oil) and simmered the sauce for about a day until it cooked down.

Meanwhile, I put the jars in the dishwasher to sterilize and the lids into water to boil.

After the sauce had cooked down, I put in the rest of the secret ingredients (grated locatelli, more basil, salt, pepper and a tiny bit of brown sugar (fresh tomatoes can be acidy -- brown sugar helps negate the acid).

And here are the fruits of my labor...Now bring on the spaghetti!

Two!!

2011-02-21T12:10:00.003-05:00

I had changed to go to the gym and was just about to sit down to a late breakfast when I noticed them -- not one, but two pileated woodpeckers on the pin oak on our yard.

I grabbed my camera (I really need a zoom lens) and stealthily ran outside in my shorts. Of course as soon as I approached they flew, but I was still able to get a couple of shots deeper into the woods.

I apologize for these -- you'll have to look closely. He's to the left of the big trunk.

This one is up in the tree...

...and then I realized how cold it was!

The Road To Hell Is Paved With Good Intentions...

2011-02-19T21:04:00.001-05:00

When Putu told us he would be sitting in the airport for almost 12 hours waiting for his flight home to Bali, we came up with a plan to pick him up at the cruise terminal in Baltimore ourselves. The plan was to then drive him to DC where we would see the White House, the Capitol Building, the Washington Monument, the Lincoln Memorial, and finally the Embassy of Bali. We would have a late lunch, his pick, before heading to Dulles for his 10:00 PM flight.

The ship was due in Baltimore by 8:00 this morning. He was to disembark at 9:00, and wait in the terminal where we would meet him. We could tell he was as excited as we were -- I'd been receiving emails from him at least once a day for the past week as the ship sailed through the Caribbean and then set sail for Baltimore.

He called at 8:30 this morning to tell us he'd see us soon. At 9:00 he called to tell me the port agent said he had to get on the bus to Dulles; we could not pick him up. He asked if I'd speak to the port agent. I said I would and waited as I heard the port agent refusing to speak with me. Putu had his passport and his visa so that wasn't a problem, and he is not a minor. I surmise it could have been a couple of things: an issue of liability and contract. The cruise line might not want to make themselves vulnerable to litigation. Or, it was an issue of the port agent being a jackass. I'm leaning toward the latter as Putu has arranged his own transportation to and from the ship on other occasions.

The good news is that after a year of hard work and missing his family very much, he will soon be on his way home to see his two small children and his lovely wife. Still, it could have been a really wonderful day.

Men In Trees

2011-02-15T22:09:00.001-05:00

This is what I woke up to this morning...

We've been having problems with two of our trees: a large pin oak in the front of our house and the kwanzan cherry tree in the back. The oak, virtually dead, has been dropping limbs onto the driveway. We figured it was only a matter of time before one of us received a serious injury, or worse, something would happen to one of our cars (insert rim shot!). The cherry tree was blocking the sun from the passive solar sunroom and its limbs were reaching way too close to the chimney of our wood-burning stove; it had become a fire hazard and really had to go.

This particular tree surgeon has been a boon to our area as long as I can remember. His team is knowledgeable, reliable, and makes quick work of the most challenging jobs. When they pull into the neighborhood, word spreads like wildfire or the Well's Fargo Wagon in The Music Man. People yell, "Mr. Redmiles is here! Mr. Redmiles is here!! Our next door neighbor saw them pull up and hired them to remove a very large and misplaced sycamore, oh, and dead -- did I say dead? Like a door nail!

It took them about 2 hours to complete the removal of three trees, grind the stumps, trim a few healthy trees, and totally clean up. Amazing! And they were really tolerant of my running around and taking pictures.

This is the crane in the driveway. ↑↑ The pin oak is directly behind the cab and our neighbor's sycamore is actually to the left of the crane, slightly beyond the pin oak.

See the man up in the tree? ↓↓

By the way, the virus has left us all (the baby was the last to get it) and we're all seemingly on the mend. (My mouth to God's ear). Thank you all for your inquiries.

And last, sometime ago Karen featured signs warning area residents that the park across the street from us would be closed on three separate dates due to their culling the herds of deer. The last date is the 22nd. The deer seem to know this and have migrated to safety. About a week ago, before I spooked all of them, thirteen stood not 20' from the sunroom. This one remained for a short period of time...

Did Anyone Get the Number of That Bus?

2011-02-09T10:07:00.001-05:00

I've been sitting here at my computer with a heating pad between my lower back and my chair for two days now. Initially I thought maybe I had pulled a muscle at the gym on Monday, but the pain does not respond to gentle stretching, Tylenol, or ibuprofen and just differs from pain caused by an injury.

Then Melissa called and asked if we could come over and help with the baby. Daughter had a fever, horrible lower back pain, and nausea. (Ah ha!) So we drove over, carrying ginger tea, ibuprofen, and a case of ginger ale.

Melissa looked like she's been hit by a bus and dragged a block or two and unfortunately, didn't feel any better than she looked. Hobbling around, I fixed her a cup of the ginger tea (she hated it -- I love the stuff -- negates nausea almost immediately), put her in bed, emptied the dishwasher, cleaned up the kitchen, and recorded Glee for when she feels better. (Yes, I love Glee -- please don't judge ☺).

Meanwhile, Poppy sat with Ariana reading books and talking. At one point, he'd closed his eyes for a minute. (We all know why only the young should have children). Ariana counted, "One, two, three, WAKE UP POPPY!!!" And then, "I DID IT!! I WOKE POPPY UP!!" Startled, he sat upright. I asked him if he wanted me to call 911; he's a real trooper.

We left after putting the little one to bed. She assured us and her mommy "Everything's going to be all right; it's okay, Mommy". Melissa is feeling a little better today. But our backs are still painful. Strange...

Okay All You Angry People....

2011-02-04T16:04:00.000-05:00

When our 2½ year old grand daughter becomes petulant I've learned that diversion is a great instrument. Two weeks ago when it was time for her to leave our home and return home with her mother, and she refused to move, refused to put her shoes on, would not allow anyone near her to put her shoes on all this while weeping disconsolately, I said, "Maybe it's time for us to sing?"

She said, "NO!"

Hoooowww abouuuut "Twinkle, Twinkle?"

"NO!"

How about "Humpty Dumpty?"

"NO!"

Hoooowwww abbouuuuut "The Itsy Bitsy Spider?"

"NO!"

Her no's became more and more strident with each answer. Thirty songs later and at the end of my Ariana repertoire, I said sarcastically, "Well, how about "Rock-a My Soul in the Bosom of Abraham" and that's about it for me."

She said, "How about "Rock-a My Soul in the Bosom of Abraham". Husband and daughter snickered, and so I launched into it -- not as well as Alvin Ailey's group -- but the crying stopped. She allowed me to put her shoes and jacket on -- a happier child.

Would it were so easy that the world's ills could be so easily mollified.

MOO

2011-02-01T16:01:00.000-05:00

It has occurred to me that the length of time I sit at this computer is directly related to the width of, er...shall we say my hips. What I'm going to do about this, I don't know. I enjoy my time reading blogs and emails, doing occasional research, playing solitaire, and, oh yes, my editing work, but something is going to have to change. Maybe if I increase the number of days at the gym or as the weather gets better -- it IS going to get better, right? -- walk through the neighborhood... I need to work on a solution to this soon as I got a passing shot of myself in the glass of our front door the other day. Holy cow!

Our Eyes Were Bigger Than Our Stomachs

2011-01-29T13:25:00.000-05:00

We took my friend, Carol to the airport this morning. Carol is escaping our weather to visit her sister in Florida. I tried to get on the plane with her, but security dragged me kicking and screaming back to our snow-covered car. (Not really -- Richard had brushed the snow off the car...).

Afterward, we drove a short distance to Catonsville and Duesenberg's where we had a late breakfast/early lunch. I had blueberry pancakes and scrambled eggs. Richard had poached eggs on fried green tomatoes and carmelized onions, topped with asparagus, hollandaise, and applewood smoked bacon. This comes with a side of Lipitor. We also ordered a crab pretzel (a soft pretzel stuffed with crabmeat and cheese and baked). We brought home half the pancakes, half of Richard's order and the whole untouched pretzel. We have enough for dinner tonight and b-fast tomorrow.

I worked all day yesterday on a request for proposal (RFP) and never made it to the gym after Monday so renewing my prospective was really good. I'll try to go to the gym this afternoon.

Our young friend, Forrest, continues to improve. He is at Level 4 of the Rancho Cognitive scores. And while not totally awake, he opened his eyes on Tuesday (the day after a prayer service was held for him) and began tracking people as they came into his room. His parents continue reading all the blog comments and messages sent to him and are touched by the outpouring of love and support. Thank you to those of you who have meditated, prayed for him, or left a message on the blog.

A Wondrous Sight

2011-01-27T10:39:00.000-05:00

I rolled out of bed this morning and immediately grabbed my camera. Couldn't get very far, but was able to open a couple of the sliding glass doors on the porch and 'hang out'. Looks like we got about 8-10" of very wet snow that now appears to be frozen to the trees. Frankly, these photos do not do it justice...

I'll be going to the gym later, if I can get out. Supposed to be a balmy 34°... a veritable heat wave!

Minestrone Anyone?

2011-01-26T10:22:00.000-05:00

Last night we were supposed to have 'periods of drizzle' but sometime in the middle of the night I woke to the sound of ice hitting our window. And this is what I saw when I got up this morning.

And it's still coming down. Supposed to stop for a while and then we'll get dumped on later tonight.
Am still fooling with the camera. Took this out the front door.

And then spotted these two frolicking in the back yard. Husband grabbed the camera because I didn't have my glasses. Can you see what we spotted? The two of them have been hanging about for the past month or so. I'm assuming they're siblings. And now we know why our squirrel population has decreased a bit.

Look over the pot on the left and then to the right of the big trunk.

The one on the right is rolling around in the snow.

I think it's time to put a nice pot of minestrone on the stove and maybe bake some bread.

A Workout and a Great Send-Off

2011-01-24T18:09:00.000-05:00

Some days it's just harder than others to workout. Although I had to force myself out the door, once I started my workout, I realized this was not one of those days in which minutes seemed like hours. I did 40 minutes of cardio and 30 minutes of weights. (The 40 minute workouts seem to leave me with less pain afterward; 60 minutes of cardio seemed to take me days to recuperate from). Listening to Sousa marches and the theme from The Magnificent Seven always spurs me on! Someday I know I'm going to slip up and start singing loudly, but at a gym where guys take out their teeth, you think someone will notice?

The funeral on Saturday was lovely, held in the church in which Richard and I were married and where Lowie (Harry's sister) and Ken were married. We saw many of Harry's friends, his children, and Lowie and Ken's children and grand babies. We were sure to leave all the babies in the cars (not alone) while we were at the cemetery as it was only about 22° and very windy. After Harry was laid to rest, my brothers, cousins and I decided to drive 'around the corner' from Harry's gravesite to 'visit' my father. The snow was too deep for us to get close to his grave so we all stood in the street hugging and crying in a big huddle. Then we started to laugh -- what, Harry's death wasn't sad enough; we had to go find someone else to mourn??? We hadn't realized that all the other cars from the funeral had decided to follow us thinking, I guess, that we were leaving this huge cemetery. My husband (sitting with Ariana) got out of the car and showed us maybe 30 cars just sitting there. Do you know no one honked their horn - not even once.

At the lunch, the six little ones ran around, holding each others' hands, dancing and diverting our sadness. Ariana (now 2½) went from table to table saying, "My name's Ariana, what's yours?" Her mother looked at me and asked, "When was she elected mayor?" It was a warming send-off.

Sunrise, A Nest, and Baked Brie

2011-01-20T08:19:00.000-05:00

Here are the first pictures taken with the new camera.

Husband took this one of the sunrise from inside the sunporch, thus the flash reflection on our neighbor's house.

This is the first photo I took. I like the dimension, but you really can't see the nest, which is what I was going for.

And here is the brie. The recipe follows.

Baked Brie

1 sheet of frozen puff pastry
1         round of brie, rind trimmed on one side
1         pear, peeled, cored, and sliced thinly
1         tablespoon of butter
½        cup chopped walnuts
½      cup dried cranberries
½        cup golden raisins
1         tablespoon honey or brown sugar
1         tablespoon bourbon (Optional)

Preheat oven to 425°.

In a microwave-proof bowl, mix butter, walnuts, dried fruit, honey/brown sugar, and bourbon. Microwave for only about a minute. Mix well and set aside.

Defrost puff pastry. Roll on a floured surface (turning often) so that pastry is about 4" larger than brie. (Pastry will be square or rectangular).

Place brie, trimmed side up on pastry.

Arrange thinly sliced pears atop the brie. Pour fruit/nut mixture on top of pears. Fold pastry corners over brie as you would wrap a package. Place on ungreased baking pan. (Pan should have slight sides -- there's a lot of butter in puff pastry!) Gently vent the top with a fork or small slits with a knife. Brush with a beaten egg. Bake in bottom half of oven for 10 minutes. Lower the oven temp to 375°. Continue baking for 25 minutes. Let sit for 10 minutes before slicing.

And On The Lighter Side...

2011-01-19T12:15:00.000-05:00

Again, I'm really touched by all your good wishes and condolences. The funeral is this weekend and the good news is that I'll be seeing my brothers, my mom, and the rest of the family.

Yesterday was my husband's birthday. He didn't want a cake, but had asked for baked brie and a salad. In this house birthday wishes are honored. We took a picture of the baked brie and as soon as I figure out how to download the photos from the new camera, I'll post it and my recipe, if anyone is interested.

Monday, while I was working out on the elliptical at the gym, an older man came in and mounted the bike directly in front of me. He was dressed so spiffily: biking shorts, cross-training shoes, a biking shirt that had pockets for his water bottle, and IPod, state of the art exercise gloves, and the latest in sound-blocking ear phones. He was working hard and I thought it was so nice to see a man his age taking care of himself and his appearance until he took out his teeth and stuck the towel in his mouth. I fought the urge to laugh aloud and/or to yell, "EEEWWW"! So much for appearances.

Prayer Request

2011-01-18T14:33:00.000-05:00

Here is the link to the blog for the young man suffering from the head injury. Thanks, in advance, for your prayers, Kathy

2011-01-18T09:53:00.000-05:00

Thank you all so much for your kind words and prayers. Harry died at 4:30 this morning. Although still reeling at the speed in which this happened, our family is strong and we love each other very much. We're good.

There are so many others that sorely need our prayers or positive thoughts. In particular, a young man named Forest who is in UVA hospital right now with a brain bleed and a friend, Jeff, who is battling cancer.

Double-Edged

2011-01-17T17:14:00.001-05:00

Our family is not a large one, especially on my mother's side.

My mother had one sister, Louise, who died almost a year ago. She was the mother of cousins Lowie and Harry.

I have two brothers and am the eldest of all the cousins (on my mother and father's side), we have all retained a nice relationship over the years. Lowie and I, in particular, only two years apart, are more like sisters than first cousins. At least we fought like sisters growing up. She still tells the story of when I smacked her with a hairbrush one night. Lies, all lies. But when I remember the 4th of July or Christmas Eve, I remember us all being together, laughing, eating, and laughing some more. Discussions always got a little loud because in Italian families, if someone doesn't agree with you, they obviously didn't hear you...

I'm sure you all realize how much a double-edged sword love is. With all these wonderful memories comes the other side of the blade: the pain of loss. As I write this my cousin Harry, four years younger than I, and two years younger than his sister, lay dying in a Philadelphia cancer center. Diagnosed about a year ago, he was doing well, responding to chemo until about three weeks ago. The cancer has infiltrated and decimated his nervous system and spread pretty much throughout his body. The good news is that he can not feel pain as the cancer cells have attacked the pain center. The bad news is that they cannot even move him to a hospice as they had planned to do today, because he would not survive the trip.

And so we deal with the grief, celebrate the love, and go about our lives, our family a little smaller, our memories more precious.

Another Round of Endorphins, Please

2011-01-15T10:33:00.002-05:00

This time 39 years ago, I was dressing for our wedding. The Mass was to have begun at 11:00 but when we got to the church, a funeral was still going on so we had to ride around the block a couple of times and wait until they put the casket in the hearse. (Luckily, I was too naïve to believe in omens).

We had planned to go to a restaurant in Baltimore tonight, but decided instead to dine on hoagies while watching the Ravens and the Steelers. It's more our style, anyway. We have been married more than half our lives -- our first year of marriage making the Tet Offensive in Viet Nam look tame -- but luckily, and with some work, found our stride and are a good team. I think we know each other very, very well and we also know what is acceptable and what would be a 'deal breaker' as far as our relationship goes

Yesterday I was a busy, busy woman. An engine light in the car was flashing (it turned out to be a softwear glitch), so I dropped the car off at the dealership, picked up a loaner , went to the gym where I did cardio and weights, came home, vacuumed and scrubbed the sunroom tile floor, put on a large pot of split pea soup, and then participated in yoga (which is why I had to scrub that floor!) Suffice to say I slept like the dead last night.

Before going to the gym, I happened to read Bilbo's blog post. What a great way to have begun my day -- I laughed so hard I cried. He featured lines from the old TV show "Hollywood Squares". I had forgotten how amazingly funny this show was. (While it was unscripted, I do believe the celebrity participants had an opportunity to preview the questions). If you could use a good laugh, check it out.

Just Enchanting

2011-01-13T17:29:00.002-05:00

Our September cruise to Canada aboard Royal Caribbean's Enchantment of the Seas was wonderful; the service excellent -- attentive but not obsequious; the food expertly prepared and served. All in all a great trip except for that little thing with the hurricane force winds on the way back.

No wonder some of the staff were so happy! Check this out. I feel badly for Royal Caribbean. In this kind of economy who needs PR like this?

Enough Is Enough

2011-01-11T17:19:00.003-05:00

Just couldn't publish another post until I finished reading everyone else's (yes, Cheryl, you're not the only one) and made comments where appropriate. But, now that I've finished here I am.

I woke this morning at 4:30. Instead of getting up and doing something constructive, I lay there and did some heavy thinking about EVERYTHING, solving the world's problems, writing magnificent posts in my head, cleaning out my closets, and mastering the intricacies of this new computer. Eventually, I fell back to sleep or the rest of the day would have been a total loss.

I'll say only three things about the tragedy in Arizona: 1) we do virtually nothing to treat the mentally ill in this country, but seem to go out of our way to facilitate their arming themselves; 2) I'm extremely angry about this, and God forgive me, the mother in me wants to tear that arrogant smile off of his face and then rip him limb from limb; and 3) where were his parents that they didn't realize there was a bizarre altar in the back yard, their son was having severe social difficulties, and that he had a 9mm glock??? Even when our kids were 22, and even now when they're older we have a pretty good handle on how they are faring.

And so now we're again left to arise from ashes...

Our Own Inquisition

2011-01-08T18:11:00.000-05:00

I just finished Barbara Kingsolver's The Lacuna, and while I did have difficulty 'getting into it' once I got about a third of the way through, I found I could not put the book down.

In this book I learned much about Leon Trotsky, artists Diego Rivera and Frida Kahlo, and more about what I consider to be the absolute darkest period in our Nation's history: the McCarthy Era.

It was during this time that a lying, power-seeking, fear monger (and these were his positive attributes), Senator Joseph McCarthy, a Republican from Wisconsin, began a reign of terror in the US that jeopardized the rights of so many good Americans. (A frequent sidekick of McCarthy was Richard Nixon) .The feared Dies Committee, aka House Un-American Activities Committee, employed questioning tactics akin to the "So when did you stop beating your wife?" ilk. "Trials" or hearings were not much different than those conducted in 1692 Salem, Massachusetts when the town elders threw the suspected witches into the pond. Only their drowning proved the alleged conjurers' innocence. Ironic, huh? The paradox? In their condemnation of all things Communist these 1950s leaders employed tactics that probably made Stalin proud.

** In addition to reading The Lacuna, if you're interested in reading more about this time, and if you haven't already read/viewed these, consider reading Arthur Miller's The Crucible, or viewing a film titled The Front. I used both of these in my 11th grade American Lit classes and the kids really seemed to get a lot from them. As always, I'm available for discussion. :)

Word

2011-01-07T10:29:00.004-05:00

I love word play -- always have. And yearly, The Washington Post Mensa Invitational -- which may or may not actually be associated with The Washington Post, celebrates it. Here is one of their lists... If Bilbo already posted this, my sincere apologies. If he didn't, "Gotcha, Bill!" :)

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus : A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication : Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation : Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright
ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign
of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy : Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
getting laid.

7. Giraffiti : Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm : The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person
who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte : To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Osteopornosis : A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon : It's like, when everybody is sending off all these
really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like,
a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day
consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido : All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've
accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.) : Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your
bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor ( n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the
fruit you're eating.

Mea Culpa or Dorothea Lange I'm Not

2011-01-05T11:38:00.000-05:00

Sorry about the tease -- I really didn't mean it that way. I've taken exactly four pictures with the new camera and only one was on purpose. (And I'm sure no one wants to see the close up of my fingers, feet, sweater). I'm just not comfortable with the camera, yet, and all the bells and whistles may be nice, but I can't see the damn things without my glasses which bang up against my face when I'm looking through the viewfinder. I need to find a way to see what I'm aiming at on the screen, but so far I can't find a way to do that. BETSY, OH BETSY!!! Do you know what I mean? If I can't soon figure it out, it's going back.

Trimming the Old

2011-01-03T11:32:00.001-05:00

I sit here in my gym clothes waiting for 12:00. Why? Because I don't want to fight the "Resolutionaries" for parking space or machine time at the Athletic Club. Yes, they'll be taking up space at the gym for the next two to three weeks; this happens every year.

We de-decorated the outside of the house yesterday. It was cloudy and raw, but we figured we had a chance to get our work done before the lights were buried in any snows the season may bestow on us although frankly, I don't think we'll be getting any appreciable snow this year. I also took the opportunity to cut back the lavender, trim the dead lily fronds and the lenten rose, and re-shape the boxwoods and pieris. I'll wait to cut the liriope to the ground until March for no other reason than I just didn't feel like doing it yesterday. It's really a messy job. I also raked a few remaining leaves. It was good to get outside -- even in the raw damp and mud.

Today is cold, but beautifully sunny. A good day to take my new camera outside for a few trial photos.

♫These Are The Good Old Days♪♫

2011-01-01T10:38:00.000-05:00

~~I was born a poor, black tenant farmer~~ . No, that isn't right... I was born in the 50s. See, I can say "the 50s" and everyone can understand the impact of that: born in the throes of Korea, the McCarthy Era, poodle skirts, American Bandstand, I'd be on the cusp of understanding all of these; wouldn't come to really know them until much later. Then there were the 60s -- a fantastic time to be alive: in my teens by then and experiencing JD Salinger, Joseph Heller, and George Orwell and waiting for the predictions of 1984 to be proven or not. Then came the 70s, 80s, and 90s, each significant, and each branding the nuances and history of the particular decade.

Yesterday a bloggerfriend mentioned the passing of yet another decade and it hit me! We've just experienced the 0s and now we're into the 11s. Just doesn't have the same ring, the same impact, does it? It seems the first 19 years of each century are nebulous and without a clear name. Do we have to wait until 2020 to ameliorate this tragic condition?

I think part of the reason I'm having trouble even recognizing the past 10 years as a decade is because we haven't 'characterized' them --there's no clear name. (Well, actually there's probably more to that -- I still can't get used to being in this new century and yet when I say '1970' it seems to me like ancient times, but this is my problem.)

So where do we go from here? Any ideas?

A New Venue or Bells and Whistles, Oh My!

2010-12-30T13:14:00.001-05:00

I had mentioned to the husband that on occasion my monitor had begun staring back at me with its very blue, kiss of death face. It happened enough that I frantically began backing everything up (which I should have been doing anyway) including all my pictures.

Well wouldn't you know that Santa got wind of this and brought me a huge-screen HP. So here I sit composing my first blog on the new computer. I have no idea how this works, or rather how to take advantage of all its bells and whistles or how to get in touch with someone to learn its intricacies, but somehow I'll muddle through.

My old computer is still functioning and I will not purge it until I'm confident that I've copied the entire hard-drive and any software to this one. Scary, isn't it? Change, that is. Maybe pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones is a good thing, no a necessity. I had a principal in one of the middle schools where I taught who said the measure of excellent education is pushing students to that point where they are no longer comfortable. (He is also the only principal I've ever had who quoted Proust during faculty meetings). I think he had something there...

Illness Becomes Them

2010-12-28T14:55:00.000-05:00

I think we are one of two groups of people. We're either the ones who learn they have an illness, follow medical advice to get well, and go about living OR, we learn of an illness and we succumb to 'living sick.' And although I can understand the latter happening, illness is just not within my nature to embrace.

Having already been hit with that cancer bus, I admit to being shocked and feeling physically and emotionally awful. It took me time to learn again to feel well -- yes learn. It was a cognizant decision on my part to accept wellness and although it took about six weeks before feeling physically almost normal, I strove to do so. I refused to become fragile, sick, helpless. It wouldn't have helped, anyway. At one point the week after surgery, my husband was traveling and both girls were staying with me. They asked if I wanted anything special to eat. I did. I craved cherry Jello. They looked at each other blankly. Neither 'knew' how to 'make' Jello. What comfort that the half a million dollars spent in college educations for the two of them resulted in such genius!

But I digress... I credit the people around me -- mostly my mother and daughters with this 'healthy' attitude. (While my husband was supportive and caring and loving, he was scared). My mom (although frightened, too) continued to remind me that I heal quickly and as simple as this seems, it affected me. My girls adamantly insisted that I had cancer (past tense), my doctor told me to get out of bed and walk a little each day because for every day I spent immobile, it would take two more to regain my strength. The attitude, the strength seeped through.

The Road To Hell Is Paved With Good Intentions

2010-12-27T15:02:00.007-05:00

Such strong reactions to thoughts of squid and calamari!! Most think it's like rubber, and I guess it is if not cooked correctly. But the answer to my query about the difference between squid and calamari was actually the punch line: Five dollars a pound! I guess it loses something in the printed form... :)

Well, I donned my exercise duds, but never made it past the family room. We had only a dusting of snow, but the winds are such that even at 2:00 PM the temps are only in the mid teens. I could still go. Mostly, I feel like doing this --

PS Betsy and Maggie will have missed this, but I did wind up going to the gym -- had intended to get there by 11, and made it by 4:30! A workout is a workout, I guess. The Lacuna here I come.

The Difference Between Squid and Calamari?

2010-12-25T09:39:00.000-05:00

* five dollars a pound!

A lovely and funny Christmas Eve. We had mussels, shrimp and linguini, and calamari and lots of cookies. Ariana (2) is terrorized of Santa Claus (to the point we have to spell it) and was afraid to open gifts. Never fear, however: Poppy to the rescue. Lots of out of control running through the house (and the little ones were wound tight, too) and tickling her ever sweet and patient 11-year old cousin, Kylie, to whom Ariana refers as her "Gulfwend". Suffice to say that S-A-N-T-A was good to everyone.

And so, dear blogger friends, I wish you a Christmas full of wonder and a New Year of many blessings.

Good Moon Rising

2010-12-21T17:23:00.000-05:00

I appreciate all of your support in letting me engage in my own little 'pity fest.' Sometimes we just need to do that. After taking it easy for the rest of the day, I'm feeling much better and have just about all of my energy back. It's no wonder, though, as Richard and I got up past 1:30 AM to view the lunar eclipse. It was very exciting, about 18°, and the stars amazed the two of us.

This is what it looked like when we first got outside.

A short time later...

And then at about 99% completed...

And then we went back to bed.

Bad Kathy or Get Off Your Bloomin' Arse!

2010-12-20T12:41:00.000-05:00

I don't understand it. For the past few days, I've had to take it easy -- as I'm just not feeling great. I think it might be a bit of a stomach bug -- no fever, no chills just lethargy and stomach stuff. And even though the Christmas cards are sent, the cookies are baked, the house decorated inside and out, the presents purchased, the party given, I feel guilty/bad/a nagging insistence that I should be cleaning baseboards, painting the laundry room, building houses for the homeless, washing floors, collecting for the Salvation Army, or cleaning out closets.

Why can't I cut myself a break? It annoys me that I just want to sit and drink ginger ale and read The Lacuna (which, by the way, I'm really having trouble getting into -- sorry Barbara Kingsolver, your other books are immediately engaging), a choice for one of the book clubs. I feel like I should be doing something -- anything...

Foot's Forecast Was Right!

2010-12-16T17:08:00.001-05:00

Foot's Forecast predicted we'd get snow in this area around 10:00 AM this morning and they were right. We've had enough to make the roads slick, people panic, and have my dear husband stuck on Eastern Shore for the night. This is what it looked like about a half hour after it started snowing...

So what did I do today? I baked pizzelles to send to my brother in Atlanta. It's a surprise, but he never reads my blog so I can mention it freely.

I'll bake some other things so the pizzelles won't be lonely on their trip South.

It's cold enough that I've got two fires going -- one here and one out on the porch. See our herd of reindeer?

Here's our decorated tree...

Our Santas...

Our creche -- which a friend of ours purchased from a craftsman in Peru.

And the house at night...

The Weather Outside is Frightful!

2010-12-15T20:06:00.001-05:00

Actually, "frightful" doesn't quite cover it; it's bitter. The heat has been on so much that we're becoming dessicated and so we've got vaporizers running on both floors. They really help with general comfort and now we're not being shocked every time we touch something. The steamer we put on top of the wood burning stove has rusted and the enamel flaked off. I've been looking for another, but don't want to spend a fortune and don't want another rusty mess. Meanwhile, a regular pot filled with water suffices.

We're coming along with all things Christmas. The shopping is almost finished and I enjoy Santa and his elves (aka US Postal Service and UPS) arriving with our purchases. The Christmas cards are almost completed; I'm doing them all by hand this year as I couldn't get the address labels to print. I find joy in listening to the Christmas music of Andrea Bocelli, Handel, Manheim Steamroller, Celtic Woman, and Maggie Sansone and while singing along, go through our list. I should be able to get them all in the mail by the end of this week. I like keeping in touch with people and sending them Christmas wishes -- even if they don't send cards -- it's my way of letting them know they are in our hearts.

We'll be having the kids (I hope all four (includes wonderful DIL)), both grand daughters, and Richard's parents here for Christmas Eve when we celebrate a truncated version of the Feast of the Seven Fishes (festa dei sette pesci). We'll probably do only four: a hot crab dip; linguini with shrimp and mussels piccata; and fried calamari. If anything in my life brings back childhood memories, it's this feast -- fodder for another post.

♪♫Our Hearts Are Warm, Our Bellies Are Full...♫*

2010-12-13T13:34:00.000-05:00

* With apologies to Rogers and Hammerstein and Carousel.

We had a wonderful time. In spite of pouring rain (we had two days of warmish temps -- and now we're back to a high of 29° or all that rain would have been snow!), everyone who was expected came. We even had to turn on the AC for a short time because it had gotten so warm inside. My husband and I feel quite blessed to have such wonderful friends and neighbors and have decided (God willing and the creek don't rise) to make this an annual thing. Tonight we'll have leftovers. Shrimp mousse, anyone?

Janette: To answer your very interesting question posed on "Praying For Our Enemies": I think you're right. I can see the change in the generations. My children, although we attended church when they were little, do not know the rituals, the feast days, the particular prayers. However, they all seem to be rather spiritual. I think leaving it up to them to have their individual epiphanies always carries some risk, but the result ultimately makes for stronger beliefs.

We're Deckin'; We're Donnin; We're Fa La La-in...

2010-12-12T13:56:00.000-05:00

In about three hours about 30 neighbors will descend upon us. We're hosting our neighborhood Christmas party. It's almost 50° and it's raining, but the temp is supposed to drop like a stone later tonight. The house is decorated, inside and out. The bathrooms are clean, and I've been cooking since yesterday -- made a variety of small sandwiches; spanokopita; baked brie with pears, walnuts and raisins; shrimp salad; the ubiquitous bread bowl dip; veggies; a huge platter of chicken tenders; meatballs, and smoked turkey and smoked ham on mini pumpkin muffins. Everyone is bringing desserts... :)

I wish each and everyone of you could join us.

And now, I need to put my feet up for a bit. Blessings.

Praying For Our Enemies

2010-12-09T14:54:00.000-05:00

Raised in an Italian Roman Catholic/Mass attending family, I'm not now a religious woman, although I consider myself spiritual. And while I do not understand how it works, I believe strongly in the power of prayer. I also believe in the existence of Good -- and wonder (and here's where my linguistic background comes in) if the development of the concept of "God" actually derives from the word "good". It makes sense. Perhaps it is not exactly 'prayer power' that elicits change, but the power of the collective 'good'. And while this is something to think about, it's not the point of my post.

At the risk of incurring the wrath of many, I confess that I pray for Bin Laden, the Taliban, and those throughout the world who through their intolerance or greed harm others. Why waste my prayers on these people? I pray for their victims and those who are preyed upon as well, but wouldn't it be wonderful, in every sense of this word, if the Peace of Goodness came to these tortured souls and they never again felt the hatred that has engulfed them and thereby affected so many others?

Perhaps it's just the season that has spurred my idealistic meandering, but considering what's at stake, what can prayer hurt?

2010-12-07T10:46:00.000-05:00

Our tree looks good, don't you think? :) Actually, we can't take credit. One of the many benefits of my mom's living where she does is that she's relatively close to us, another is that she's a stone's throw from the beautiful Longwood Gardens in Kennett Square. This is one of the trees in the conservatory. We purchased tickets for their Christmas exhibit through the alumni association of our college about a month ago, but had no idea how magnificent and festive the gardens would actually be. We visited there on Saturday evening along with hundreds of others. It was worth braving the chilly temperatures, the crowds of very polite people, and the college's total screw up of our admission. The Longwood folks were wonderful; the college folks, not so much. No big news there...

These gargoyles in the children's garden are magical

as was the outdoor train garden

The outdoor train garden was magical

This bell thing is one of a kind. The sounds issued from it are magnificent.

The player was dressed a la Phantom of the Opera - mask and all.

And then time to go look for our car....

Taking Responsibility

2010-12-05T10:42:00.001-05:00

Last night, I read in the current issue of The Week, that a man serving time in a Connecticut prison for vehicular manslaughter of a 14-year old boy is suing the child's parents for contributory negligence as the child hadn't been wearing a helmet while he was riding his bike. Of course, the fact that the driver was going 80 mph at the time had 'nothing' to do with the child's death.

A dear friend of ours lost his leg some years back in an explosion at the plant where he worked. He decided not to sue because he felt strongly that 'stuff happens'. The plant had not been negligent, he said, and he realized that he could have been sitting on Easy Street for the rest of his life, but to place blame was just wrong. The employer had met their responsibilities in taking care of his medical bills.

While not exactly polar in the scheme of things, I thought these two incidents somewhat related. So at what point do we place blame and at what point do we accept responsibility for our actions? Our society heavily espouses the "it wasn't my fault because...." (fill in the appropriate excuse: I was poor as a child, my parents abused me, I always felt like an outcast, my wife had just left me, et cetera) theory. But it seems to me that doing so negates any responsibility. It's like saying "I'm sorry, but..." which isn't an apology at all.