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I am a retired English teacher and department head, the mother of three grand mother of four, and have been married to the same man for 52 years. I subscribe to Dr. PM Forni's concept of Civility. I was born in South Philadelphia and grew up in the 'burbs. I love soft pretzels and cheesesteaks, the Phillies, the Eagles, and San Diego. I love being Mom, Aunt Kathy, Nona Kathy, and Teacher. I spend a lot of time in my gardens in the spring and summer, and in the winter I plan what I'm going to plant. I also am an avid reader and photographer.

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Thursday, September 11, 2014

How Quickly He Fell

I haven't had any real need to express myself until today and I'm sure that what I have to say will not curry favor.  But, this is my blog; my circus.

Some of you may enjoy football.  For those of you who don't follow it, this blog may mean nothing.  On the other hand, one would have to be a hanging salami to not have heard anything about our beloved Ravens' player, Ray Rice, and the trouble he is in because of his battering his wife, Janay, in an Atlantic City casino elevator.  After this was made known, Rice was fined and suspended from two games; this by the NFL.  The outcry over the laxity of the punishment was immediate as was pressure to NFL Commissioner Robert Goodal to do more.

Ray Rice was a favorite player of mine and a hero to many.  To say that I was chagrined by the attack is a gross understatement.  His attack on Janay was brutal as the allegedly 'recently' released tape shows.  The Ravens' decision to release him from his contract quickly followed.  So did the NFL's banning him from football for life.

Did Rice deserve some kind of punishment?  Absolutely.  Is the one he got just?  I'm really not sure that banning him from football for life is.

Now before some of you light torches and march on my home, remember I am not denying how serious battering another person  is.  But I get the distinct feeling that Rice is suffering the results of all the actions sadly NOT taken by the NFL on past egregious actions of its players.   I also believe that we all deserve a second chance.  To take away this man's livelihood forever seems wrong.  Rice and his wife are in counseling.  They need to work out their problems without the help of the public.  (And yes, I realize that they were the ones who took their problems out in public.)  He is already a pariah.  On Friday and Saturday of next week, fans will line up At M & T Stadium to return their Ray Rice jerseys.  This has to be horribly painful for his family.

Also, football is a brutal sport.  Players have ingrained in them the knee-jerk, vicious re-actions that are appropriate only in war and on the football field.  Once a part of a man's fabric, this becomes second nature and hard to turn off.  Again, I am not excusing Ray Rice.  There are consequences for every action we take -- a hard-to-learn lesson for all of us.  I am not sure, however, that these consequences for his actions are totally appropriate.


6 comments:

Linda Reeder said...

I agree. I think this case has been blown all out of proportion, and the reactions are an example of mass hypocrisy.
Where is the hue and cry, or the help, when a battered woman of no notoriety, and anonymous woman, if you will, shows up in the emergency room?
This case is different only because the persons involved are famous, and much to the delight of the tabloid media, there is VIDEO!
So now it's fair game for everyone to jump on the case and spout their opinions and call for punishment. Oh. we love punishment in this country, unless it falls on us personally.
I could go on, but I'll wrap it up by saying this family needs to be left alone to heal. As for the NFL, it's a business. Let the chips fall where they may. You know most of America will still be watching their favorite team come Sunday.

Betsy Banks Adams said...

I'm getting sick of hearing all about this on TV... Too many people who have no business passing judgment on someone else are definitely opening their big mouths when it comes to this one.. The media drives me CRAZY sometimes... Everyone is so judgmental.

YES, Ray Rice made a hug mistake. But--don't we all????? Ours may not be as evident since we are not in the NFL. YES--he needs to be punished (more than the 2 games he originally got)... BUT--some people are truly trying to take his entire life away from him...

His wife is probably crazy for staying with him --but she loves him. She did stay. It's HER business. It's her life... It's THEIR life together...

I say: Let's see what he/they do for this next year (if people will get off of their backs, and let them get help). He is known to be a really good guy. He's smart.. He has done alot of really good things. I guess I'm more into: let's wait and see what he chooses to do with his life for the next year or so... IF he gets out there and helps others and gets help for himself, I hope he CAN play football again.. But--that's just my feelings. Some people have VERY strong feelings about this one--led by the media....

Hugs,
Betsy

beachgirl said...

I feel very strongly on this one. I left on a domestic issue and never regretted that decision.
The fact that she married him after the attack says a lot. Her decision. Not ours.
The NFL punishment now is insane. You have taken a mans living away from him. His release valve away.
They are in therapy. Which is awesome. I hope it works.
But because of the media hysteria over every little thing, his life and those of his family are destroyed for no reason. I am just glad that I have no reason for TMZ, etc to come after me or my family.

Sally Wessely said...

I think you have written a reasonable response about this news. I can't disagree with anything that you said.

Kay said...

I agree with Betsy that she was crazy to marry him after what he did to her.

Gilly said...

We have had a very similar case in the UK. A well-known footballer, a hero to many, especially young boys, was convicted of rape, and served part of his prison sentence. There was a huge outcry when his club proposed re-signing him. I think they have changed their minds. He has shown no remorse for his actions, and the outcry, those who signed petitions etc. argued that re-signing him as a player, once again to be adulated, would pass the wrong message to his followers - that rape is acceptable.

I thought at first it was a lot of hot air and over-reaction, that he had served his sentence, etc. etc.. But footballers (our English soccer, not your American type!) are heroes to so many, their actions and thoughts and way of life considered to be the ideal, that I now think those who were so against him taking up his career in football again are right. There is nothing against him doing what the rest of us do, and finding an 'ordinary' job, but football - no.

And off the subject, well almost, I do think footballers 'earn' an obscene amount of money and are given far too much attention! Maybe the same in the US??