It's Going to Take Some Time

I'm foregoing a Christmas letter this year.  Maybe because it would read like a page from the Book of Job.

It has been a terrible year:  full of trauma and loss.  I know that we're not the only ones and my prayers go out to all the others who are finding the Christmas joy, still beautiful, still awesome, but a bit contradictory to the way we feel.

And just to clarify, there are still Blessings to be counted:  a wonderful marriage and husband; three gorgeous and kind children (two of whom have WONDERFUL mates) and four grands who are all doing well (my mouth to God's ear), a successful family business, fantastic brothers, and the kindness of many around us.

Yet, the losses are substantial:  my mother three weeks ago; my friend and next door neighbor two weeks ago; and about 13 extended family/close friends before that.  

We managed to decorate the outside of the house, but have skipped the inside...is this a metaphor or what!?   I just don't have time to heal before Christmas.

Doing Much Better, Thank You

You are all a blessing to me -- your kindness and support truly humble me.  I must admit I'm a little embarrassed by my post, but am in a better frame of mind now that my travail has been spoken/written.


Yesterday after I published, I said to myself, "What would you say to someone who expressed those feelings?"  The first thing I'd say to them is, "Get out in the sunshine for at least 20 minutes."  So I, w/ my old-lady walker, did just that.  I walked to our mailbox - about half a block down the street.  Then I came home, had a nice breakfast (that I made myself) and situated myself into the CPM (Continuous Passive Movement) machine that is on our couch, set it at 55%, and plugged it in.  My goal was to get it to 60% before the day was over.  I downloaded a positive, whimsical book (The Peach Keeper) onto my NOOK and began reading.


The day after the surgery, I told my ortho that I didn't expect it to hurt so much.  He admitted to me that this is by far the most painful surgery he does.  He asked, "Do you have any idea of what we do for a total knee replacement?  -- It's more like a day a Home Depot".   Then he reminded me to keep hitting that morphine button.


We're expecting a little wet snow here today.  I've got PT this afternoon barring dangerous conditions.  It'll be a treat to get out.

The Lusty Month of May

I've said many times that May is my favorite month of the year: it is lush and green and full of hope. It is in May, I arrange and plant the many pots in my garden. It is in May I get to shop for all the annuals that will provide color through to the fall. It was in May that I was given a new beginning with my cancer as on the 29th I will celebrate my 'other' birthday -- the day of my surgery. See! May is looking more and more like the month of Thanksgiving! Come to think of it -- even my car looks like a cornucopia of gifts!