Amici I've Never Met

Several years ago my two brothers and I decided we were going to learn Italian. (We grew up in an Italian family, and our maternal grandmother lived with us.  While 'passable' her English was considered 'broken', but we kids could understand her.  Our mother, who did not speak English until she began school, was made fun of.  So we children were raised as "American", only to fall in love with a language we partially understood.)  

I took a course at the local community college, and then with my brothers began to use RosettaStone (okay - but very expensive and the program is not super user friendly), and then Duolingo (much better -- free with limited use, and then very affordable with unlimited use).  I learned much, but wanted more.

I found a language school in the District of Columbia (Casa Italiana)  that offers both in person and online classes. (It used to be that we could get into DC within 30 minutes from our home, but congestion, construction, and traffic have made the trip as long as two hours, and one can never really predict.)

So I opted for an online course in which I met a lovely professoressa, and seven equally lovely campagni di classe (classmates).  For 12 weeks we met every Tuesday night for two hours.  By the end of the 12 weeks I felt a kinship with these gracious folks, and on this Sunday we will actually meet for the first time for coffee at the school.

PS  Everyone was lovely -- including the barista!!  What a wonderful place;  I felt at home.

A few members of out class and our teacher (second from left)...

The bells and tower remind me of St. Mark's Square in Venice.

In All the Right Places

 I've noticed that many folks are decorating for Christmas early.  While we'd pretty much adhered to celebrating Thanksgiving before decorating, we've relented.  This year has been difficult for so many.

With a year filled with animosity and vitriol many are finding their joy where they can...we being among this group.

And so we'll decorate, enjoy seeing others' decorations, have folks in for desserts and coffee, smile at passersby, take long walks in all sorts of weather and look for herons, fox, eagles, et cetera, send Christmas cards even to those who do not reciprocate, write a Christmas letter that neither brags nor 'eulogizes' our family (we've all received these), that is not filled with the trite, and that somehow brings some joy to those who read it. (This is going to be a challenge, but I think I can do it without being totally irreverent).

In short we will make our own joy, do what we can to help others, and be thankful and aware of the good that is in our lives.

No Vice Too Insignificant

 Last night at dinner I ordered a glass of red wine.  The couple with whom we dined were shocked.  "You're drinking wine?"  

"Yes, I'm drinking,  thinking of taking up smoking, and seriously considering debauchery."  

Are these not the new norms?   Pathological lying; bullying until one gets what they want;  consorting with enemies; inciting riots and sedition; infidelity in marriage, sexually assaulting women, undermining all established rules for one's own benefit?

Let's celebrate lack of refinement, ignorance, and abject vulgarity!  Absolutely no virtue is worth defending, or should be left unscathed.

We have been lied to:  Crime pays;  the truth enslaves; God is dead; and the Anti-Christ is headed for the White House.

Wow!  Have we ever been playing this wrong.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some deadly sins to investigate.

What the +%#* ??

When did it become socially acceptable to shovel anathema and vulgarity on people with whom one does not agree?   Now a commonplace act.

On our way to a favorite restaurant we saw a cute bungalow along this public and very visible national highway, boasting a huge flag with the words "F --- Biden!" for everyone, young and old, to see.  (Try explaining this one to your six-year old.)

And in beautiful Rehobeth Beach, on the lovely square not four blocks from Biden's family home, and only two blocks from the church he attends, sits a pick-up truck with hundreds of Trump signs plastered on it.  Not a problem.

(This is when I wish my pointer finger were a flame-thrower).

What I failed to mention is that it includes vulgarities aimed at both Biden and Harris.  Vulgarities that  I blush at mentioning.  Despite efforts of local residents and Rehobeth business owners, the man refuses to move his truck as it is his First Amendment right.  No matter how it affects others. To those the vulgarities are directed; to those who live there; to those whose businesses are affected by it.  Evidently he is not capable of otherwise expressing himself.

What a dual-edged sword freedom of speech is.

Musings on a Reunion

 I attended a very large high school (it might have been the largest in the state) outside of Philadelphia.  I had not gone through the public school system, but had attended a Catholic parochial elementary school, and my first year of high school (ninth grade) at a private girls' school.  

So when I transferred to Upper Darby High School as a tenth grader I was very much the odd man out...  Friendships had been formed in elementary school, enjoyed and cemented in junior high.  I did make friends:  There were lots of chums I met in classes and homeroom.  I had lunch with Dee and Michele everyday, took the trolley with Richie to early morning choral rehearsals, sang in the Concert Choir with Roger and Richard M, attended plays in Philadelphia...

My husband and I attended my 15th reunion.  I saw folks that I recognized, but no one with whom I had been close attended.  In fact, the folks I had been closest to had seemingly fallen off the face of the Earth.  After we married 53 years ago, we moved to my husband's 'stomping grounds' outside of Baltimore, Maryland.  I always envied that at any moment he could run into someone he went to school with; someone from his past.  I missed that.

Fast forward a decade or three.  I had tried contacting a few classmates.  Dee made it clear she didn't want to be found; R never answered notes and invitations I had sent to him and his wife; Roger had died out in San Francisco (from what and when I never did learn).  R2 did contact me.  Now retired from a distinguished career in the military he lives not far from us in Virginia.  He visited me at the school where I was teaching, we had a great lunch, and a sweet time catching up with one another, and then I never heard from him again.  Lest I be misunderstood, these were not romantic interests, but a connection to a time and place I missed.

Our reunion is scheduled for October.  Two of these folks will be there.  I'd go but it would be for all the wrong reasons:  primarily, I'd want to know why they ghosted me, and while I'm curious, I realize it's not that important, that I'm not important, at least to them.

Living on Ginger Ale

 Last week my dear husband had a slightly scratchy throat.  Five years ago this would have meant nothing, but now...  A few days later his symptoms developed into a cough, running nose, and lethargy.  He tested, and of course was positive for COVID.  He alerted our doctor who prescribed Paxlovid, which mitigated his symptoms within 24 hours.  He's feeling much better and has now tested negative.

Several days after his positive test, I began to feel 'weird':  the tops of my fingers hurt --(there was no visible injury (look up 'COVID TOES')), my upper back hurt to the point I couldn't move comfortably, and then I began to feel horrendously nauseated (I wouldn't wish this on...wait a minute, I take that back, I can think of a few public figures), and sleepy...and then lower GI symptoms ensued.  And, I tested positive.

It seems one of the newer strains of COVID is this lovely GI version, and more than several people I know (no one with whom I've come in contact) have had it.  Five days later and I'm doing a lot better.  The nausea has abated for the most part, although Canada Dry and I are still close friends.

We have no idea when or where we picked this gem up, but rest assured:  it's out there.

Our Own Oasis

 Several years ago we applied for a grant in which we entered into an agreement with the State of Maryland and Columbia Association to have a 'rain garden' installed on our property.

You may have seen varieties of run-ff mitigation along highways and in medial strips, where strategically placed river stone, and native plants have replaced grass.  These areas not only protect bodies of water like the Chesapeake Bay from contamination, but they do not have to be so constantly maintained, and they look good!!

Rain gardens are one of the many ways to mitigate uncontrolled run-off from heavy rains.  But in addition to controlling storm drainage into the Chesapeake Bay, they feature native and non-invasive flora, and so the added benefit to these gardens is they attract pollinators such as bees and hummingbirds, and they are beautiful as well as functional.

Here is ours in various stages of growth.

A Walk in the Park...

 Since the pandemic we've been walking when we can, usually around one of the four local lakes that thanks to Columbia Association, have beautifully mailed bridges and paths, benches for that well-needed rest or just to gaze at the plantings surrounding the lakes, and the frequent fauna visitors:  amphibian; reptilian; fowl; and mammalian.  

Each walk is a discovery and we take time to really stop and look around us.  I marvel at those walking while looking at a phone screen -- I really have no idea how they can do that and remain vertical!

We have favorite spots including the swings that CA installed.

Coming to You From a New Computer!

 I made the transition yesterday.  Or began it...  There's a strong learning curve and this old dog...well, you get it.  But I strongly believe that change, while sometimes painful, is very good for the soul.  "Complacency is the hobgoblin of little minds."  RWE

Now I'm hoping to be able to include pictures of our gardens and from our walks.  Taking daily photos was something we initiated during the Pandemic. Today, however oday, I'm going to try to publish some of our garden photos...

Some have asked about my gardening, specifically is it too much, or when is enough enough?  My answer is it's enough when it no longer brings me joy.  And right now these gardens, the flowers, the blooms and some of the critters they attract bring us both great joy.

 

IT'S OKAY, HON

A good friend was lamenting an experience they had had at a local restaurant, where the server was overly affectionate, call them "Honey, Dear, Sweetheart..."

And while I agree that this is a little over the top, I wonder if the use of these terms of endearment is perhaps not such a bad thing.  Granted too much can be sickening, but an occasional "Hon" or "Dear" isn't that overstepping... Is it?  

We're living in a time when vulgarity, name calling, and hate in speech seem to be the norm.  Is it so bad to temper the anger with a little sweetness?

Miriam Margoles OBE is a British actress -- often salty-mouthed and cutting, frequently shocking.   Recently I heard her speak on the use of non gender- indicating pronouns.  She was bristling at having to use "they" or "them" and also found it confusing.  (I, too, while not feeling as strongly, find the use of the plural pronouns a bit baffling.  Chalk that up to my teaching English for so many years).

Upon some introspection, however, she realized that this is such a miniscule issue.  Furthermore, and most importantly, if it makes someone happy, why not?

Why not, indeed?