About Me

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I am a retired English teacher and department head, the mother of three grand mother of four, and have been married to the same man for 48 years. I subscribe to Dr. PM Forni's concept of Civility. I was born in South Philadelphia and grew up in the 'burbs. I love soft pretzels and cheesesteaks, the Phillies, the Eagles, and San Diego. I love being Mom, Aunt Kathy, Nona Kathy, and Teacher. I spend a lot of time in my gardens in the spring and summer, and in the winter I plan what I'm going to plant. I also am an avid reader and photographer.


Sunday, January 17, 2010

A Message From an Incredibly Intelligent Woman

It seems all of my adult life I have grappled with my weight.  I am not the woman I was before I had my third child (who weighed 10 pounds at birth) (three months afterward, people were still asking me when I was due); much to my chagrin, svelte is a thing of the past.  Not a sedentary person, I work out frequently -- doing an hour of cardio plus weights three times a week.  I'm still shapely, just more Rodinesque than modernly popular. I'm not dilusional -- I know that being a 'foodie' and my love of cooking and eating in wonderful restaurants has its price.  But every once in a while validation arrives.   A friend of mine sent me this yesterday.

Recently, in a large city in Australia ,
a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym.
It said, "This summer,
do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"
A middle-aged woman,

whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster,
responded publicly to the question
posed by the gym.

To Whom It May Concern,
Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans.)

They have an active sex life,
get pregnant and have adorable baby whales.
They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp.

They play and swim in the seas,
seeing wonderful places like  Patagonia ,
the Bering Sea
and the coral reefs of  Polynesia .
Whales are wonderful singers
and have even recorded CDs.
They are incredible creatures

and virtually have no predators
other than humans.
They are loved, protected and admired
by almost everyone in the world.

Mermaids don't exist.

If they did exist,
they would be lining up outside the offices
of Argentinean psychoanalysts
due to identity crisis. Fish or human?
They don't have a sex life
because they kill men who get close to them, not to mention how could they have sex?
Just look at them ... where is IT?
Therefore, they don't have kids either.
Not to mention,
who wants to get close to a girl who smells
like a fish store?

The choice is perfectly clear to me:

I want to be a whale.

P.S. We are in an age

when media puts into our heads
the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids, a
 good dinner with a man who makes me shiver, and a piece of chocolate with my friends.
With time, we gain weight
because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads
that when there is no more room,
it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.
So we aren't heavy,

we are enormously cultured,
educated and happy.
Beginning today,

when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think,
¨Good grief, look how smart I am!¨


Paula said...

Kudos to the Australian woman. Will there ever come a time when women truly accept themselves and their bodies without feeling the need for validation? If we had to meet and get to know one another with our eyes shut perhaps our hearts would be more open and accepting of the gifts we have to offer instead of what we look like.

Purple Flowers said...

Paula said it beautifully.

Rick Rockhill said...

well said! I love that Kathy

beachgirl said...

I love the poem. I am on the thin side and have been my whole life. All the other females in my family are womanly size.
My daughter is a full figure kind of girl.
My whole life people have accused me of having an eating disorder. I never have had one. Just food allergies. I eat without combining lots of things. That way I don't feel sick.
I have had people come up to me and say "you are so skinny you make me sick." What!! My mother weighed 300 lbs. I would never say that to a heavy person. I say lets be happy with our bodies.
I work hard to stay firm. My goal was to look healthy at 50. I look great at 51. And I eat what I want that doesn't make me sick.

Cheryl said...

I loved this Kathy. You are enormously cultured, educated and happy. And smart!

Ruth Hull Chatlien said...

I enjoyed this too. And I also applaud what beachgirl said.

Gilly said...

Oh I love, it, love it!! Makes me feel quite wise and womanly!

Sweet Virginia Breeze said...

I loved this post - it is so true. Must be why after 60 years, I finally put on some weight.

A Slice of My Life said...

I like what Paula said. We often put so much value on what people look like (and I'm not just talking size) that we don't get to know the real person inside.

Today, for the first time ever, I'm glad I have a big butt! lol

Kimberly said...

Love it!! Now I can feel good about getting "smarter" as I sit and do nothing but mend!

Anonymous said...


jane said...


Eliane Zimmermann said...

save the whales! i am one too ;-)