About Me

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I am a retired English teacher and department head, the mother of three, grand mother of three, and have been married to the same man for 42 years. I subscribe to Dr. PM Forni's concept of Civility. I was born in South Philadelphia and grew up in the 'burbs. I love soft pretzels and cheesesteaks, the Phillies, the Eagles, and San Diego. I love being Mom, Aunt Kathy, Nona Kathy, and Teacher. I spend a lot of time in my gardens in the spring and summer, and in the winter I plan what I'm going to plant. I also am an avid reader and photographer.


Sunday, April 11, 2010

I'll Say it Again....

This post is of particular importance to me and so here it is, yet again.  Blessings, Kathy

Sunday, April 5, 2009

The Club and In Memory of Gilda

I read for lots of different reasons. Sometimes I want to learn, sometimes I want to be entertained, and sometimes I just want to escape! Having read some pretty commanding stuff lately, I chose to read The Friday Night Knitting Club (2007) by Kate Jacobs. I thought this would be a combination "chick lit"/learn something/appreciate women's issues kind of read. And for the most part it was. Until I got about half way through the book when I realized I didn't know that much about the main character -- enough to like her or want to know her. There seems a huge disconnect about the way she sees herself and the way others view her -- repeatedly; annoyingly. Granted, this is often part of the human condition: a universal theme. But there is more.

An author walks a treacherous road in character development. She can't divulge too much about her characters, but must take care to 'hint' to her readers along the way, otherwise occurrences fly out of left field -- literally and figuratively jolting her readers. Great literature contains surprises, but they still have to make sense -- some modicum of information given that allows the feasibility of the events to take place. For those of you considering reading this book STOP HERE. I'm about to give away the ending.

In The Friday Night Knitting Club the main character goes to her gynecologist after a long lapse in visits, where she learns she has an ovarian tumor that 'looks malignant.' Only after the diagnosis and radical hysterectomy does the character mention that she felt occasional bloating. In her defense, Jacobs does briefly mention that ovarian cancer is a 'silent killer' -- that by the time symptoms are noticed, it's often too late. This is accurate medicine, but it's not appropriate plot or character development. After her course of chemo, Georgia Walker, doubles over in pain and dies in the hospital a few days later.

There is a big reason why this upset me so. First, I've taught and read enough literature that I recognize good plot and character development when I read it. And probably more importantly, on May 29th of this year, I celebrate my sixth anniversary of wellness. It was on this day in 2003, that I was shocked to discover I had ovarian cancer. The tumor had been growing for quite some time and I had 'quiet symptoms' but symptoms nevertheless. Scheduled for what we expected was the removal of four small cysts on my left ovary (about an hour's procedure via a laparoscopy), I would be released from the hospital the next morning. (I had been pre-warned, however, that if the cysts were at all suspicious, the means by which they would be removed would change). After about seven hours of surgery, being cut from above the navel to the symphisis pubis, and a radical bi-lateral hysterectomy and appendectomy, I awoke groggy and in pain to the truth.

When a psychologist came to see me the next morning and asked what I knew about ovarian cancer, all I could think about was Gilda Radner and her valiant struggle with ovarian cancer and so replied, "Everyone I've ever known who has had ovarian cancer is dead." She told me that ten years prior this was very true, but there are many more survivors now. She was right. More and more women survive this 'silent killer' every year. Knowing this Kate Jacobs does every one of us who have survived ovarian cancer a great dis-service.


Lena said...

Blessings to you! What a lot to go through! How fortunate for women that there are more survivors now.

I remember reading Gilda's book years ago.

Take care, Kathy. I always enjoy your posts!

Purple Flowers said...

It's understandable and obvious that you disagree with the Author. Do you think she didn't do enough research?

Gilly said...

I remember your post from last year. its good to be reminded of the way we should try to understand our bodies and the way they warn us.

Thank you for posting that again. Sometimes its good to be alive!

Sweet Virginia Breeze said...

I tried to read "The Friday Night Knitting Club" but couldn't get into it - never even got halfway through. Thank goodness there are more and more cancer survivors every year. So glad you are one of them. An important post.

cri said...

it's never too late to learn italian language. How to write, to speak. It was a famous italian's program, dedicated to illiterates from 0 to 90 years, in the 60's.
Kisses, Cristina

Cheryl said...

You're a fighter and a survivor. Six years...the time has flown. I'm SO glad you're well and cancer-free.

Cobalt Violet said...

Just found your blog and was very moved by your post.
I know what you mean about having heard all the scary language about ovarian cancer.

I find it very hard to hear. For me, my ovarian tumor came out 1 year ago. It was not benign (a HUGE unfortunately) and every time I have to go in for an ultrasound I freak out. Anyway, it sounds like you are surviving and thriving and for every woman that is, my heart is so grateful and full of hope.

Thank you.

George said...

Congratulations on your years of wellness. I hope you have many, many more.
Thanks for visiting my site.

likeschocolate said...

Please please tell your story to everyone. I had a dear friend of mine die last year from Ovarian cancer. She was only 38 years old. Now I tell everyone that you are never to young to get ovarian cancer and encourage them not to miss Dr. appts. Congratulations on 6 years.

jane said...

i read the book and had the same thoughts... was surprise that there was a sequel. now i´m off to make an appt- i´m about 2 month overdue. sending you a big hug kathy. p.s. how i wish you´d write something... chick lit/learn something/appreciate women´s issues... i´m just saying...

Paula from Amen Corners said...

Thank you for writing such an important and very personal post. Grateful.

beachgirl said...

I am so glad you are 6 years cancer free. What an eye opener for sure.
Enjoy your weekend.