Notre Dame Cathedral virtually burned to the ground this week; still more immigrants seek asylum; our country 's divide grows as those corrupt and hate-filled saturate the news with anathema and their power. Temperatures wold-wide have increased two degrees, and Mother Nature becomes more and more violent in her response.
More importantly, this is the week I was told I have breast cancer. I saw the mammogram; I intrinsically knew it didn't look good; I saw the look on the faces of the technicians and the radiologist; I saw they wouldn't look me in the eye, and yet I was devastated when told. I waited until my husband left for work, and then sobbed.
I wonder if the fates heard me when I've frequently said I don't want to grow old. Frailty terrifies me. What I'm feeling now is a close second. I'm at the mercy of others.
I mourn the loss of my normal. I mourn that a part of my body that I love is now sick. I see the shirts that boast, "These are fake; my real breasts tried to kill me," and while I appreciate the humor, I cannot join in with the laughter as something I treasure, with which I've lived for 67 years is sick and will soon be under the knife. And as trivial as it seems, I'm saddened by my soon-to-be bald head, and wondering if I can learn how to tie a scarf, a pretty one that makes me look as if I'm handling my illness well.
- I am a retired English teacher and department head, the mother of three grand mother of four, and have been married to the same man for 48 years. I subscribe to Dr. PM Forni's concept of Civility. I was born in South Philadelphia and grew up in the 'burbs. I love soft pretzels and cheesesteaks, the Phillies, the Eagles, and San Diego. I love being Mom, Aunt Kathy, Nona Kathy, and Teacher. I spend a lot of time in my gardens in the spring and summer, and in the winter I plan what I'm going to plant. I also am an avid reader and photographer.